"The Unbearable Lightness Of Being"
By Milan Kundera
37
the weak, in the camp of the weak, in the country of the weak, and that she had to be
faithful to them precisely because they were weak and gasped for breath in the middle
of sentences.
She felt attracted by their weakness as by vertigo. She felt attracted by it because she
felt weak herself. Again she began to feel jealous and again her hands shook. When
Tomas noticed it, he did what he usually did: he took her hands in his and tried to calm
them by pressing hard. She tore them away from him.
What's the matter? he asked.
Nothing.
What do you want me to do for you?
I want you to be old. Ten years older. Twenty years older!
What she meant was: I want you to be weak. As weak as I am.
Karenin was not overjoyed by the move to Switzerland. Karenin hated change. Dog
time cannot be plotted along a straight line; it does not move on and on, from one thing
to the next. It moves in a circle
like the hands of a clock, which—they, too, unwilling to
dash madly ahead—turn round and round the face, day in and day out following the
same path. In Prague, when Tomas and Tereza bought a new chair or moved a flower
pot, Karenin would look on in displeasure. It disturbed his sense of time. It was as
though they were trying to dupe the hands of the clock by changing the numbers on its
face.
Nonetheless, he soon managed to reestablish the old order and old rituals in the Zurich
flat. As in Prague, he would jump up on their bed and welcome them to the day,
accompany Tereza
on her morning shopping jaunt, and make certain he got the other
walks coming to him as well.
He was the timepiece of their lives. In periods of despair, she would remind herself she
had to hold on because of him, because he was weaker than she, weaker perhaps
even than Dubcek and their abandoned homeland.
One day when they came back from a walk, the phone was ringing. She picked up the
receiver and asked who it was.
It was a woman's voice speaking German and asking for Tomas. It was an impatient
voice, and Tereza felt there was a hint of derision in it. When she said that Tomas
wasn't there and she didn't know when he'd be back, the woman
on the other end of the
line started laughing and, without saying goodbye, hung up.
Tereza knew it did not mean a thing. It could have been a nurse from the hospital, a
patient, a secretary, anyone. But still she was upset and unable to concentrate on
anything. It was then that she realized she had lost the last bit of strength she had had
at home: she was absolutely incapable of tolerating this absolutely insignificant incident.
"The Unbearable Lightness Of Being" By Milan Kundera
38
Being in a foreign country means walking a tightrope high above the ground without the
net afforded a person by the country where he has his family, colleagues,
and friends,
and where he can easily say what he has to say in a language he has known from
childhood. In Prague she was dependent on Tomas only when it came to the heart;
here she was dependent on him for everything. What would happen to her here if he
abandoned her? Would she have to live her whole life in fear of losing him?
She told herself: Their acquaintance had been based on an error from the start. The
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