100 Ways to Motivate Others : How Great Leaders Can Produce Insane Results Without Driving People Crazy

Attitude
is a word that old people use to intimidate
young people. It’s the ultimate shaming device: “You bet-
ter change your attitude, Son!”
“How, Dad?”
“Don’t mess with me, Son.”
“What is attitude, Dad? How do I access it? How do I
even identify it, much less change it?”
“It’s poor, I can tell you that.”
If you were ever part of such a conversation, you got
off on the wrong track in this whole concept of change.
Reinventing yourself happens. But it happens as a result
of a series of gentle shifts. It’s a path, not a revolution. It
becomes a way of life.
Just begin.
Don’t Change Yourself

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88. Pump Up Your E-mails
No pessimist ever discovered the secrets of the stars, or sailed to
an uncharted land, or opened a new heaven to the human spirit.
—Helen Keller
Every e-mail communication you send to your team is
an opportunity. It’s a fresh chance to energize that team
and spread the optimism you want to fuel the contagious
enthusiasm your next project needs.
But nine managers out of 10 ignore this opportunity.
Instead, they often send neutral e-mails; short, terse e-mails;
or sometimes even angry e-mails.
Those are all mistakes. Because your first job, even
before your job of informing others, is to 
motivate
others.
So let’s begin here: realize that e-mail is a cold me-
dium anyway. There is no voice tone in it. There is no
twinkle in the eye, or warmth of expression. It’s just cold
electronic type.
Therefore, even a neutral e-mail feels chilly to the re-
cipient. Even a simple transfer of information feels icy
and negative, unless you seize the opportunity to pump it
up. Always pump it up.
Every communication from a manager to an employee
is an opportunity to instill optimism. Don’t waste that op-
portunity. A true leader never does.
Look at your e-mail before you send it. Is it uplifting?
Does it contain an acknowledgment or an appreciation of
the recipient? Does it praise the recipient? Does it inspire?
Is it going to make someone happy?

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If not, take the extra minute to go back over it. Change
the negative tone to a positive one. Brighten it up. Ask
yourself: Would you be happy to get this e-mail? Would
you feel honored and appreciated if you received it?
Behavioral studies continue to show that positive
reinforcement works more than seven times better than
negative criticism to change behavior.
Negative criticism causes resentment, depression, an-
ger, and sabotage. People will sabotage your leadership if
they feel alienated and underappreciated.
Pump things up and watch what happens. Don’t take
this on faith; use trial and error. Send half of your people
a neutral e-mail and half a positive one, and see which gets
the best results.
You will be able to test this concept by doing it. You
will be delighted with the results you get.
89. Stop Pushing
Pull the string, and it will follow wherever you wish. Push it, and
it will go nowhere at all.
—Dwight D. Eisenhower
Thomas Crum gives seminars on how to use aikido
philosophy in daily business life. He calls what he teaches
“The magic of conflict.”
Scott remembers being there during one of Crum’s
demonstrations. Crum had someone come to the front of
the room and stand up in front of him.
Stop Pushing

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“Put out your hand like this,” said Crum as he put his
hand up as if taking an oath, touching the student’s up-
raised hand. Crum pushed on the student’s upraised hand,
and the student just naturally, automatically reacted by
pushing back.
Crum said, “That’s the natural way of human beings. I
push, you give me resistance. You push back.”
Then, he asked the student to extend his hand in the
form of a fist. He did, and then Crum put his hand in a
closed fist in front of him and they both pushed against
each other. Each fist pushing the other.
“This is the way we experience life a lot,” said Crum.
“Just like this. A stalemate or struggle, where I’m trying to
win or you’re trying to win. In aikido, we don’t ever resist.”
Right at that moment Crum dropped his fist down,
and instantly the volunteer pushed right by him (and, in
aikido, you turn in the direction of the person going by
you). Crum turned with the volunteer and guided him
quickly and gently to the floor.
Crum said, “Now, this is aikido. I no longer resist, so
we’re no longer fighting. And guess what? We’re in per-
fect alignment so it’s very easy for me to direct this person
wherever I choose him to go. And that’s how aikido works.”
In fact, the characters