A masterpiece of translations

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This is the secret of my youth, you know, my dears?
Everyone looked at each other in amazement. Nobody understood anything.
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No, father, we did not understand anything. Speak more clearly, please, -
said the guests.
Grandpa laughed:
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Yes, my dears, haven't you noticed the secret? Didn't you notice that my 
wife brought out the same watermelon every time? There was only one 
watermelon in the warehouse. As soon as I said, "Go get another one," she ran to 
the stables. She brought the same watermelon again and again. She didn't complain
once: "Man, have you lost your mind? Why are you chasing me when there is only 
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one watermelon?" He did not embarrass me in front of you. So far, I am healthy.
And I am indebted to my wife for her extensive volunteering. We never leave each 
other in a difficult situation. We have always supported each other, shared our
pain, 
and helped each other. We tell each other our problems and solve them together. 
We will be together in any situation, good or bad.
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Worldview
There were two brothers. The older brother was generous, lucky, and rich,
while the younger brother was a murderer and a villain. Before the trial, journalists
asked the killer brother:
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How did you get into crime?
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My childhood was difficult. My father drank and beat me and my mother.
Who else could I be?
Then the journalists asked the elder brother a question:
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How did you become so successful?
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My childhood was difficult. My father drank and beat me and my mother.
Who else could I be...?!
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