Ielts writing Task 1 + 2

360 words
IELTS EXAMINER COMMENTS
+ Task response:
This was an interesting task question, and you answered the question fully. I
cannot improve on the technique which you used. You stated your position
clearly in the introduction and consistently throughout the essay. The
beginning of paragraph 3 and your conclusion were the ideal places to restate
your opinion. All the points which you mentioned were relevant and fully
developed and I have to give a score of 8.5 for this section.
+ Coherence and cohesion:
Your paragraph structure was, as I have already mentioned, clear and logical.
I then looked at your topic sentences. These indicated expertly the central
idea in each paragraph. I, therefore, scored 9
+ Lexical resource:
The language meets the criteria (natural and appropriate). The essay
contained some good topic vocabulary: become addicted to watching
television, become over-reliant on television for entertainment, engagement
in outdoor activities, find it hard to play or live in harmony with others, feel
discouraged from having real interactions, etc.
+ Grammatical range and accuracy:
You certainly used a good range of grammar, including adverb clauses,
relative clauses, conditional forms, comparatives and other useful
constructions. So, this section again achieves a maximum score.
Telegram - @officialieltsreality

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SAMPLE 2
Some people believe that people have the right to university education, and
government should make it free no matter what their financial background.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
MODEL ESSAY:
It is true that
some people argue for the universal right to free university
education. 
While I accept that this may suit many people
, 
I believe that it is
impractical
for governments to implement such a policy.
On the one hand
, it is not a practical dream to expect government authorities
to fund higher education for those poorer sections of society, with low
incomes and no savings. Without such funding, people from poor
backgrounds would be unable to attend university. 
As a result
, they would be
excluded from many well-paid careers as engineers, doctors or lawyers.
Social inequalities would be perpetuated and society as a whole would suffer,
since those from low-income backgrounds would have no opportunity to
develop their talents. 
The example of the US
, during the struggle for civil
rights for blacks and other minorities, shows the folly of denying equal
educational opportunities for the poor.
On the other hand
, there would be an enormous strain on government budgets
if free access to university were a right for everyone. 
At its simplest
, people
from rich families can afford to pay tuition fees and for their own
maintenance during their studies. Attendance at university is a privilege, not a
right, and if students can afford to pay for their studies, they should do so. 
In
practical terms
, governments cannot pay for the rich as well as the poor.
Governments are faced with practical decisions on how to allocate their finite
budgets, and funding free higher education for everyone would mean less
money to spend on pressing issues such as health care or the environment.
In conclusion
, 
I disagree with the view that
free higher education should be a
right for everyone in society, and funding 
should be limited to those who
otherwise could not afford to attend university.