An Apparition at the Door
Once, I got up in the middle of the night because I was thirsty, and I saw Mom
standing outside Auggie's room. Her hand was on the doorknob, her forehead
leaning on the door, which was ajar. She wasn't going in his room or stepping
out: just standing right outside the door, as if she was listening to the sound of
his breathing as he slept. The hallway lights were out. The only thing illuminating
her was the blue nightlight in August's bedroom. She looked ghostlike standing
there. Or maybe I should say angelic. I tried to walk back into my room without
disturbing her, but she heard me and walked over to me.
"Is Auggie okay?" I asked. I knew that sometimes he would wake up choking on
his own saliva if he accidentally turned over on his back.
"Oh, he's fine," she said, wrapping her arms around me. She walked me back
into my room, pulled the covers over me, and kissed me good night. She never
explained what she was doing outside his door, and I never asked.
I wonder how many nights she's stood outside his door. And I wonder if she's
ever stood outside my door like that.
Breakfast
"Can you pick me up from school today?" I said the next morning, smearing
some cream cheese on my bagel.
Mom was making August's lunch (American cheese on whole-wheat bread, soft
enough for Auggie to eat) while August sat eating oatmeal at the table. Dad was
getting ready to go to work. Now that I was in high school, the new school
routine was going to be that Dad and I would take the subway together in the
morning, which meant his having to leave fifteen minutes earlier than usual, then
I'd get off at my stop and he'd keep going. And Mom was going to pick me up
after school in the car.
"I was going to call Miranda's mother to see if she could drive you home again,"
Mom answered.
"No, Mom!" I said quickly.
"You pick me up. Or I'll just take the subway."
"You know I don't want you to take the subway by yourself yet," she answered.
"Mom, I'm fifteen! Everybody my age takes the subway by themselves!"
"She can take the subway home," said Dad from the other room, adjusting his tie
as he stepped into the kitchen.
"Why can't Miranda's mother just pick her up again?" Mom argued with him.
"She's old enough to take the subway by herself," Dad insisted.
Mom looked at both of us. "Is something going on?" She didn't address her
question to either one of us in particular.
"You would know if you had come back to check on me," I said spitefully, "like
you said you would." "Oh God, Via," said Mom, remembering now how she had
completely ditched me last night. She put down the knife she was using to cut
Auggie's grapes in half (still a choking hazard for him because of the size of his
palate). "I am so sorry. I fell asleep in Auggie's room. By the time I woke up . . ."
"I know, I know." I nodded indifferently.
Mom came over, put her hands on my cheeks, and lifted my face to look at her.
"I'm really, really sorry," she whispered. I could tell she was.
"It's okay!" I said.
"Via . . ."
"Mom, it's fine." This time I meant it. She looked so genuinely sorry I just wanted
to let her off the hook.
She kissed and hugged me, then returned to the grapes.
"So, is something going on with Miranda?" she asked.
"Just that she's acting like a complete jerk," I said.
"Miranda's not a jerk!" Auggie quickly chimed in.
"She can be!" I yelled. "Believe me."
"Okay then, I'll pick you up, no problem," Mom said decisively, sweeping the
half-grapes into a snack bag with the side of her knife. "That was the plan all
along anyway. I'll pick Auggie up from school in the car and then we'll pick you
up. We'll probably get there about a quarter to four."
"No!" I said firmly, before she'd even finished.
"Isabel, she can take the subway!" said Dad impatiently. "She's a big girl now.
She's reading
War and Peace
, for crying out loud."
"What does
War and Peace
have to with anything?" answered Mom, clearly
annoyed.
"It means you don't have to pick her up in the car like she's a little girl," he said
sternly.
"Via, are you ready? Get your bag and let's go."
"I'm ready," I said, pulling on my backpack. "Bye, Mom! Bye, Auggie!" I kissed
them both quickly and headed toward the door.
"Do you even have a MetroCard?" Mom said after me.
"Of course she has a MetroCard!" answered Dad, fully exasperated. "Yeesh,
Momma! Stop worrying so much! Bye," he said, kissing her on the cheek. "Bye,
big boy," he said to August, kissing him on the top of his head. "I'm proud of
you. Have a good day."
"Bye, Daddy! You too."
Dad and I jogged down the stoop stairs and headed down the block.
"Call me after school before you get on the subway!" Mom yelled at me from the
window. I didn't even turn around but waved my hand at her so she'd know I
heard her. Dad did turn around, walking backward for a few steps.
"
War and Peace
, Isabel!" he called out, smiling as he pointed at me. "
War and
Peace!
"
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