George Bernard Shaw a penn State Electronic Classics Series Publication



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Bernard Shaw - Pygmalion

after the other with all her force] There are your slippers. And
there. Take your slippers; and may you never have a day’s
luck with them!
HIGGINS 
[astounded] What on earth—! [He comes to her].
What’s the matter? Get up. [He pulls her up]. Anything wrong?
LIZA 
[breathless] Nothing wrong—with YOU. I’ve won your
bet for you, haven’t I? That’s enough for you. I don’t matter,
I suppose.
HIGGINS
. YOU won my bet! You! Presumptuous insect! I
won it. What did you throw those slippers at me for?
LIZA
. Because I wanted to smash your face. I’d like to kill
you, you selfish brute. Why didn’t you leave me where you
picked me out of—in the gutter? You thank God it’s all over,
and that now you can throw me back again there, do you?
[She crisps her fingers, frantically].
HIGGINS 
[looking at her in cool wonder] The creature IS
nervous, after all.
LIZA 
[gives a suffocated scream of fury, and instinctively darts
her nails at his face]!!
HIGGINS 
[catching her wrists] Ah! would you? Claws in,
you cat. How dare you show your temper to me? Sit down


60
Pygmalion
and be quiet. [He throws her roughly into the easy-chair].
LIZA 
[crushed by superior strength and weight] What’s to be-
come of me? What’s to become of me?
HIGGINS
. How the devil do I know what’s to become of
you? What does it matter what becomes of you?
LIZA
. You don’t care. I know you don’t care. You wouldn’t
care if I was dead. I’m nothing to you—not so much as them
slippers.
HIGGINS 
[thundering] THOSE slippers.
LIZA 
[with bitter submission] Those slippers. I didn’t think
it made any difference now.
A pause. Eliza hopeless and crushed. Higgins a little uneasy.
HIGGINS 
[in his loftiest manner] Why have you begun go-
ing on like this? May I ask whether you complain of your
treatment here?
LIZA
. No.
HIGGINS
. Has anybody behaved badly to you? Colonel
Pickering? Mrs. Pearce? Any of the servants?
LIZA
. No.
HIGGINS
. I presume you don’t pretend that I have treated
you badly.
LIZA
. No.
HIGGINS
. I am glad to hear it. [He moderates his tone]. Per-
haps you’re tired after the strain of the day. Will you have a
glass of champagne? [He moves towards the door].
LIZA
. No. [Recollecting her manners] Thank you.
HIGGINS 
[good-humored again] This has been coming on
you for some days. I suppose it was natural for you to be
anxious about the garden party. But that’s all over now. [He
pats her kindly on the shoulder. She writhes]. There’s nothing
more to worry about.
LIZA
. No. Nothing more for you to worry about. [She sud-
denly rises and gets away from him by going to the piano bench,
where she sits and hides her face]. Oh God! I wish I was dead.
HIGGINS 
[staring after her in sincere surprise] Why? in
heaven’s name, why? [Reasonably, going to her] Listen to me,
Eliza. All this irritation is purely subjective.


61
Shaw
LIZA
. I don’t understand. I’m too ignorant.
HIGGINS
. It’s only imagination. Low spirits and nothing
else. Nobody’s hurting you. Nothing’s wrong. You go to bed
like a good girl and sleep it off. Have a little cry and say your
prayers: that will make you comfortable.
LIZA
. I heard YOUR prayers. “Thank God it’s all over!”
HIGGINS 
[impatiently] Well, don’t you thank God it’s all
over? Now you are free and can do what you like.
LIZA 
[pulling herself together in desperation] What am I fit
for? What have you left me fit for? Where am I to go? What
am I to do? What’s to become of me?
HIGGINS 
[enlightened, but not at all impressed] Oh, that’s
what’s worrying you, is it? [He thrusts his hands into his pock-

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