183 Networking: The New Conversation
Who is your link with the host organisation?
How did you start out
?
Be careful with the question ‘Why?’ It’s hard not to sound like an
interrogator
using that word, however hard you try.
Now listen for remarks that will generate another question.
Have that question ready in the back of your mind as you listen
on: you’ve solved the next move in the conversation and can
relax a little!
Share something about yourself. (Remember the rule in
Chapter 1: no more than three
questions before you make a
different kind of move.) Try to link your remark to what they have
said. If you feel comfortable, shift the conversation to start
discussing your aims for being there –
and perhaps your aims for
this conversation.
Summarise and paraphrase. Check your understanding of
what the other person is saying; this keeps you focused, gives you
time to think of something else to
say and shows that you are
listening.
Another way to keep the conversation going is to bring
someone else in.
Chris, come and join us. We’re just talking about…
I know who you should meet. Let me try to find Firoze…
‘Passing the ball’ in this way can relax or enhance a conversation.
It can also be a good way to bring a conversation to a close
politely: having introduced people to each other, you can excuse
yourself and move on.
Joining groups
Approaching a group of people
is slightly different from
approaching an individual. People often worry about how to
break into group conversations that are already in progress – and
whether to do it. Being able to ‘read’ the group is helpful.
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