"The Unbearable Lightness Of Being" By Milan Kundera
127
He was so upset he sat straight up in bed. Tereza was breathing deeply beside him.
The woman in the dream, he thought, was unlike any he had ever met. The woman he
felt he knew most intimately of all had turned out to be a woman he did not even know.
And yet she was the one he had always longed for. If a personal paradise were ever to
exist for him, then in that paradise he would have to live by her side.
The woman from
his dream was the
Es muss sein!
of his love.
He suddenly recalled the famous myth from Plato's
Symposium:
People were
hermaphrodites until God split them in two, and now all the halves wander the world
over seeking one another. Love is the longing for the half of ourselves we have lost.
Let us suppose that such is the case, that somewhere in the world each of us has a
partner who once formed part of our body. Tomas's other part is the young woman he
dreamed about. The trouble is, man does not find the other part of himself. Instead, he
is sent a Tereza in a bulrush basket. But what happens if
he nevertheless later meets
the one who was meant for him, the other part of himself? Whom is he to prefer? The
woman from the bulrush basket or the woman from Plato's myth?
He tried to picture himself living in an ideal world with the young woman from the
dream. He sees Tereza walking past the open windows of their ideal house. She is
alone and stops to look in at him with an infinitely sad expression in her eyes. He
cannot withstand her glance. Again, he feels her pain in his own heart. Again, he falls
prey to compassion and sinks deep into her soul. He leaps out of the window, but she
tells him bitterly to stay where he feels happy, making
those abrupt, angular
movements that so annoyed and displeased him. He grabs her nervous hands and
presses them between his own to calm them. And he knows that time and again he will
abandon the house of his happiness, time and again abandon his paradise and the
woman from his dream and betray the
Es muss sein!
of his love to go off with Tereza,
the woman born of six laughable fortuities.
All this time he was sitting up in bed and looking at the
woman who was lying beside
him and holding his hand in her sleep. He felt an ineffable love for her. Her sleep must
have been very light at the moment because she opened her eyes and gazed up at him
questioningly.
What are you looking at? she asked.
He knew that instead of waking her he should lull her back to sleep, so he tried to come
up with an answer that would plant the image of a new dream in her mind.
I'm looking at the stars, he said.
Don't say you're looking at the stars. That's a lie. You're looking down.
That's because we're in an airplane. The stars are below us.
Oh, in an airplane, said Tereza, squeezing his hand even
tighter and falling asleep
again. And Tomas knew that Tereza was looking out of the round window of an airplane
flying high above the stars.
"The Unbearable Lightness Of Being" By Milan Kundera
128
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