No Longer Human Osamu Dazai


notebook shut without writing anything



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notebook shut without writing anything.
What a failure. Now I had angered my father and I could be sure
that his revenge would he something fearful. That night as I lay
shivering in bed I tried to think if there were still not some way of
redressing the situation. I crept out of bed, tiptoed down to the parlor,
and opened the drawer of the desk where my father had most likely put
his notebook. I found the book and took it out. I riffled through the
pages until I came to the place where he had jotted down our requests
for presents. I licked the notebook pencil and wrote in big letters LION
MASK. This accomplished I returned to my bed. I had not the faintest


wish for a lion mask. In fact, I would actually have preferred a book.
But it was obvious that Father wanted to buy me a mask, and my
frantic desire to cater to his wishes and restore his good humor had
emboldened me to sneak into the parlor in the dead of night.
This desperate expedient was rewarded by the great success I had
hoped for. When, some days later, my father returned from Tokyo I
overheard him say to Mother in his loud voice—I was in the children's
room at the time—"What do you think I found when I opened my
notebook in the toy shop? See, somebody has written here 'lion mask.'
It's not my handwriting. For a minute I couldn't figure it out, then it
came to me. This was some of Yozo's mischief. You know, I asked him
what he wanted from Tokyo, but be just stood there grinning without
saying a word. Later lie must have got to wanting that lion mask so
badly he couldn't stand it. He's certainly a Funny kid. Pretends not to
know what he wants and then goes and writes it. If

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