No Longer Human Osamu Dazai


soured. Finally, in desperation, he shakes off the woman. The proverb



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soured. Finally, in desperation, he shakes off the woman. The proverb
means that when a man becomes half-mad, he will shake and shake and
shake until he's free of a woman. You'll find that explanation given in
the Kanazawa Dictionary, more's the pity. It isn't too hard for me to
understand that feeling myself!"


I remember making Tsuneko laugh with just such stupid remarks. I
was trying to get away quickly that morning, without so much as
washing my face, for I was sure that to stay any longer would be useless
and dangerous. Then I came out with that crazy pronouncement on
"love flying out the window," which was later to produce unexpected
complications.
I didn't meet my benefactor of that night again for a whole month.
After leaving her my happiness grew fainter every day that went by. It
frightened me even that I bad accepted a moment's kindness: I felt I
had imposed horrible bonds on myself. Gradually even the mundane
fact that Tsuneko had paid the bill at the cafe began to weigh on me,
and I felt as though she was just another threatening woman, like the
girl at my lodging house, or the girl from the teacher's training college.
Even at the distance which separated us, Tsuneko intimidated me
constantly. Besides, I was intolerably afraid that if I met again a
woman I had once slept with, I might suddenly burst into a flaming
rage. It was my nature to be very timid about meeting people anyway,
and so I finally chose the expedient of keeping a safe distance from the
Ginza. This timidity of nature was no trickery on my part. Women do
not bring to bear so much as a particle of connection between what

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