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Celebrate your achievements
We assume success is about being famous, rich
and owning expensive things. But if you’ve pulled
yourself out of a dark place, that’s a great success in
itself. Don’t forget that you’re winning each day you
don’t give up and you make it through to the next.
Did you know that you’re achieving great things every day? It probably
doesn’t seem like it if you’re always looking ahead to the next thing.
Nevertheless, many of the things you’ve achieved today are things you
dreamed about in the past. You just don’t notice them in the moment they
happen. Or they pass you by too quickly.
Although we shouldn’t get so comfortable with our achievements that we
become complacent and stop moving forwards, we should make time to
celebrate them. Otherwise you’ll look back on your life and think you didn’t
do anything significant. But if this were true, your life would always have
remained the same.
We’re too hard on ourselves. We remember everything that we’ve done
wrong, but hardly ever think about the things we’ve done right. Does that
sound familiar? If it does, it’s because you’re too self-critical.
You have to give yourself a pat on the back every now and then. You’ve
done things some people said you couldn’t do. You’ve done things even 
you
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thought you couldn’t do. Be proud of yourself. You’ve fought hard to get
where you are today. Acknowledging this will bring contentment and raise
your vibration.
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Respect your uniqueness
Your individuality is a blessing, not a burden. If
you try to be like everyone else, your life will be
no greater than theirs. By following the crowd,
you’ll become a part of it and fail to stand out. By
travelling the same road as them, you won’t get the
chance to see anything different from what they see.
As young children, we’re regularly reminded that we’re all individuals and
should have no shame in being ourselves. We’re encouraged to pursue our
wildest dreams! But as we get older, our world of possibility shrinks. People
say, ‘Yes, be yourself… but not like that!’ or ‘You can be anything in the
world… but 
this
is the right path to take.’
In psychology, the concept of ‘social proof’ suggests that people like to
follow the crowd. If everyone else is doing it, you assume it’s the right thing
to do. Other people influence your actions more than you realize. For
example, if you had to pick between two new bars and you could see that one
was packed while the other isn’t, you’d assume that the empty one sucked
and the popular one was much better! But just because everyone else is doing
it does 
not
mean it’s right. Slavery used to be legal, but now nearly everyone
would agree that it’s inhumane, degrading and immoral.
Start to question your actions. Why do you do what you do, and choose what
you choose? Are you doing what you really think is right, or are you
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following the crowd? If you discover your choices are frequently dictated by
the views of others, you know you’re relinquishing control over your life.
Without control, we panic and end up in low vibrational states, such as
anxiety. Ultimately, we end up having no control over how much joy we
experience, as we become slaves to other people’s opinions.
Fear and scarcity are commonly used to control society. I’ve known many
people who, instead of living the life they’d have chosen, have lived the life
they were told to by others in the form of well-meaning guidance and
support. And while some people 
want
what’s best for you, they may not
understand
what’s best for you. They may also make decisions for you based
on fear that’s been passed on to them by someone else.
You can listen to the crowd
or you can listen to your soul
and be on your own stage.
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But you shouldn’t feel like you’re living someone else’s beliefs. You
shouldn’t feel like you have to meet everyone else’s expectations or live your
life a certain way to gain their approval. You shouldn’t feel like you have to
shy away from being who you really are, from your uniqueness. Life
shouldn’t feel limiting.
The truth is that, either way, you’re going
to be judged, whether you live life on
your own terms or on other people’s.
Someone once said that a tiger doesn’t lose sleep over the opinion of sheep.
The tiger isn’t swayed by judgements from animals whose behaviour is
dictated by social conditioning. The sheep constantly seeks validation,
changes direction and loses its own identity; therefore, it remains lost and ill
fated.
Say the word ‘silk’ 10 times out loud.
Now tell me: what do cows drink?
Did you say ‘milk’?
If you did, you’ve fallen into the trap of a psychological technique called
priming
. I set you up for a particular answer, even though it’s false. Another
example: if I told you a story about how I was lost in the middle of nowhere
once and had no idea how to get out, and then told you to complete the word
‘st_ck’, you’d be more likely to say ‘stuck’ instead of ‘stick’.
Priming also provides cues to help the memory without realizing the
connection. Imagine if you could set people up to think and act in a certain
way, without knowing. This is exactly what marketing companies do all the
time to increase sales.
Authenticity is rare these days, and many of our actions are at the suggestion
of someone else. Without drawing you into paranoia, we’re easily
reprogrammed to satisfy the needs of another human being – or, indeed, of a
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corporation.
Don’t let your individuality get taken away from you, just so you can fit in
with the rest of society. Embrace your uniqueness. Are you considered
weird? Awesome! This is only because most people are living inside an
imaginary box and you don’t fit in it; and we’re led to believe that when you
don’t fit society’s needs, something is wrong with you. Who wants to be
bounded by a box that isn’t even there? Not me! Freedom has no constraints.
We can always improve ourselves and grow as individuals. We can step out
of our comfort zone and challenge ourselves. But society often makes us feel
like we’re wrong for just being ourselves.
They will call you quiet because you’re
perfectly happy in silence.
They will call you weak because you
avoid conflict and drama.
They will call you obsessed for being
passionate about the things you love.
They will call you rude for not
engaging in social pleasantries.
They will call you arrogant for having self-respect.
They will call you boring for not being extrovert.
They will call you wrong for having different beliefs.
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They will call you shy when you choose
not to interact in small talk.
They will call you weird because you choose
not to conform to societal trends.
They will call you fake for trying
your best to remain positive.
They will call you a loner because you’re
comfortable being on your own.
They will call you lost for not following
the same route as others.
They will call you a geek for being
a knowledge-seeker.
They will call you ugly for not
looking like celebrities.
They will call you dumb for not being an academic.
They will call you crazy for thinking
differently from others.
They will call you cheap for
knowing value for money.
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They will call you disloyal for distancing
yourself from negative people.
Let them call you what they want. You don’t have to play the part they want
you to play. Create your own part to play in the world.
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