Reminders of Him

Scotty did that.
Grace releases a quick rush of air. “I’ll be honest, Kenna. I didn’t want
that ring after he died. And I didn’t want you to have it because I was so
mad at you. But when we found out Diem was a girl, I decided to hold on to
it. Just in case I wanted to pass it on to her someday. But after giving it
some thought . . . that’s really not my decision to make. I want you to have
it. Scotty bought it for you.”
There’s too much coursing through me to process this, so it takes me a
moment to recover. I shake my head. I’m too scared to believe her. I don’t
even allow the words to sink in. “Thank you.”
Grace reaches over and squeezes my hand, prompting me to look at
her. “I promised Ledger I wouldn’t tell you this, but . . . he gave us one of
the letters you wrote to Scotty.”
I’m shaking my head even though she isn’t finished talking. How did
Ledger get one of those letters? Which one did he give them?
“He made me read it last night.” Her expression falls. “After hearing
your version of events, I was even more devastated and angry than I was
before I read it. It was so hard . . . hearing all the details. I cried all night.
But this morning when I woke up, it was as if an overwhelming sensation of
peace had washed over me. Today was the first morning I didn’t wake up
angry at you.” She wipes at the tears now sliding down her face. “All these
years, I assumed your silence in the courtroom was indifference. I assumed
you left him in that car because you only cared for yourself and didn’t want
to get in legal trouble. Maybe I assumed all those things because it was
easier to have someone to blame for such a horrific and pointless loss. And
I know your grief shouldn’t bring me peace, Kenna. But it’s so much easier
to understand you now than when I assumed you never grieved at all.”
Grace reaches toward a strand of hair that’s fallen loose from my ponytail,
and she brushes it gently behind my ear. It’s something a mother would do,

---

and I don’t understand it. I don’t know how she can go from hating me to
forgiving me in such a short amount of time, so I continue to be wary of this
moment. But the tears in her eyes feel like the truth. “I am so sorry, Kenna.”
She says that with such sincerity. “I’m responsible for keeping you from
your daughter for five years, and there’s no excuse for that. The only thing I
can do is make sure you don’t go another day without knowing her.”
My hand is trembling when I bring it to my chest. “I . . . I get to meet
her?”
Grace nods, and then she hugs me when I fall apart. She runs a
soothing hand over the back of my head and allows me several minutes to
absorb everything that’s happening.
This is everything I’ve ever wanted, and it’s coming at me all at once.
It’s both physically and emotionally overwhelming. I’ve had dreams like
this before. Dreams where Grace shows up to forgive me and lets me meet
Diem, but then I wake up alone and realize it was a cruel nightmare. Please
let this be real.
“Ledger is probably dying not knowing what’s going on in here.” She
stands up and walks to the door to open it for him.
Ledger’s eyes search frantically until they land on mine. When I smile
at him, he immediately relaxes, as if my smile is the only thing that
mattered in this moment.
He pulls Grace in for a hug first. I hear him whisper, “Thank you,”
against her ear.
She looks at me before she leaves my apartment. “I’m making lasagna
tonight. I want you to come for dinner.”
I agree with a nod. Grace leaves, and Ledger is wrapping me in his
arms before she even closes the door.
“Thank you, thank you, thank you.” I say it over and over, because I
know this would never have happened if it weren’t for him. “Thank you.” I
kiss him. “Thank you.” When I finally stop thanking and kissing him long
enough to pull back and look him in the eye, I see he’s crying too. It fills me
with a sense of gratitude like I’ve never known.
I am so grateful for him. To him.
This might be the exact moment I fall in love with Ledger Ward.

---

“I’m about to be sick.”
“Want me to pull over?”
I shake my head. “No. Drive faster.”
Ledger squeezes my knee reassuringly.
It was torture having to wait until this afternoon to make our way to
Patrick and Grace’s house. I wanted him to take me to Diem as soon as
Grace left my apartment, but I want everything to be on their terms. I’ll be
as patient as I need to be.
I’m going to respect their rules. I’ll respect their timeline, and their
choices, and their wishes. I’m going to show them as much respect as I
know they’ve shown my daughter.
I know they’re good people. Scotty loved them. They’re just also hurt
people, so I respect the time they needed to come to this decision.
I’m nervous I’m going to do something wrong. Say something wrong.
The only other time I’ve been inside their house was such a series of
missteps, and I need this time to be different because there’s so much at
stake.
We pull into Ledger’s driveway, but we don’t immediately get out of
the truck. He gives me a pep talk and kisses me about ten times, but then I
become more nervous and excited than I’ve ever been, and the emotions all
start to run together. If I don’t get it over with, I might explode.
He holds my hand tightly in his as we cross the street, and walk across
grass Diem has played on, and knock on the door to the house Diem lives
in.