The Godfather

 “The Godfather” By Mario Puzo
 
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were a dead man. And I was so delighted when I could say the word ‘warts.’ Because 
your singing gave me so much pleasure, helped me seduce girls when I was younger 
and you’re a real artist. But also you’re a very spoiled guy. Do you think because you’re 
Johnny Fontane you can’t get cancer? Or a brain tumor that’s inoperable. Or a failure of 
the heart? Do you think you’re never going to die? Well, it’s not all sweet music and if 
you want to see real trouble take a walk through this hospital and you’ll sing a love song 
about warts. So just stop the crap and get on with what you have to do. Your Adolphe 
Menjou medical man can get you the proper surgeon but if he tries to get into the 
operating room I suggest you have him arrested for attempted murder.” 
Jules started to walk out of the room when Valenti said, “Attaboy, Doc, that’s telling 
him.” 
Jules whirled around and said, “Do you always get looped before noontime?” 
Valenti said, “Sure,” and grinned at him and with such good humor that Jules said more 
gently than he had meant to, “You have to figure you’ll be dead in five years if you keep 
that up.” 
Valenti was lumbering up to him with little dancing steps. He threw his arms around 
Jules, his breath stank of bourbon. He was laughing very hard. “Five years?” he asked 
still’ laughing. “Is it going to take that long?” 
* * *
A month after her operation Lucy Mancini sat beside the Vegas hotel pool, one hand 
holding a cocktail, the other hand stroking Jules’ head, which lay in her lap. 
“You don’t have to build up your courage,” Jules said teasingly. “I have champagne 
waiting in our suite.” 
“Are you sure it’s OK so soon?” Lucy asked. 
“I’m the doctor,” Jules said. “Tonight’s the big night. Do you realize I’ll be the first 
surgeon in medical history who tried out the results of his ‘medical first’ operation? You 
know, the Before and After. I’m going to enjoy writing it up for the journals. Let’s see, 
‘while the Before was distinctly pleasurable for psychological reasons and the 
sophistication of the surgeon-instructor, the post-operative coitus was extremely 
rewarding strictly for its neurological”– he stopped talking because Lucy had yanked on 
his hair hard enough for him to yell with pain. 
She smiled down at him. “If you’re not satisfied tonight I can really say it’s your fault,” 

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