The Importance of Being Earnest

Miss Prism.
No married man is ever attractive except to his wife. 
Chasuble.
And often, I’ve been told, not even to her. 
Miss Prism.
That depends on the intellectual sympathies of the 
woman. Maturity can always be depended on. Ripeness can be 
trusted. Young women are green. [
Chasuble.'>Dr. Chasuble
starts.] I spoke 
horticulturally. My metaphor was drawn from fruits. But where is Cecily? 
Chasuble.
Perhaps she followed us to the schools. 
[Enter 
Jack
slowly from the back of the garden. He is dressed in the deepest 
mourning, with crape hatband and black gloves.] 
Miss Prism.
Mr. Worthing! 
Chasuble.
Mr. Worthing? 
Miss Prism.
This is indeed a surprise. We did not look for you till Monday 
afternoon. 
Jack._My_brother._Miss_Prism._More_shameful_debts_and_extravagance_Chasuble._Still_leading_his_life_of_pleasure_Jack.'>Jack.
[Shakes 
Miss Prism’s
hand in a tragic manner.] I have returned sooner 
than I expected. Dr. Chasuble, I hope you are well? 
Chasuble.
Dear Mr. Worthing, I trust this garb of woe does not betoken 
some terrible calamity? 
Jack.
My brother. 
Miss Prism.
More shameful debts and extravagance? 
Chasuble.
Still leading his life of pleasure? 
Jack.
[Shaking his head.] Dead! 
Chasuble.
Your brother Ernest dead? 
Jack.
Quite dead. 
34

---

Miss Prism.
What a lesson for him! I trust he will profit by it. 
Chasuble.
Mr. Worthing, I offer you my sincere condolence. You have at 
least the consolation of knowing that you were always the most generous 
and forgiving of brothers. 
Jack.
Poor Ernest! He had many faults, but it is a sad, sad blow. 
Chasuble.
Very sad indeed. Were you with him at the end?