George Bernard Shaw a penn State Electronic Classics Series Publication



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Bernard Shaw - Pygmalion

vengefully.
HAWKINS
. “Second, that he shall be a good friend to my
old horse Jim”—(again slacking his head) he should have
written James, sir.
RICHARD
. James shall live in clover. Go on.
HAWKINS
. —and keep my deaf farm laborer Prodger Feston
in his service.”
RICHARD
. Prodger Feston shall get drunk every Saturday.
HAWKINS
. “Third, that he make Christy a present on his
marriage out of the ornaments in the best room.”
RICHARD 
(holding up the stuffed birds). Here you are,
Christy.
CHRISTY 
(disappointed). I’d rather have the China peacocks.
RICHARD
. You shall have both. (Christy is greatly pleased.)
Go on.
HAWKINS
. “Fourthly and lastly, that he try to live at peace
with his mother as far as she will consent to it.”
RICHARD 
(dubiously). Hm! Anything more, Mr. Hawkins?
HAWKINS 
(solemnly). “Finally I gave and bequeath my soul
into my Maker’s hands, humbly asking forgiveness for all
my sins and mistakes, and hoping that he will so guide my
son that it may not be said that I have done wrong in trust-
ing to him rather than to others in the perplexity of my last
hour in this strange place.”
ANDERSON
. Amen.
THE UNCLES AND AUNTS
. Amen.


21
GB Shaw
RICHARD
. My mother does not say Amen.
MRS. DUDGEON 
(rising, unable to give up her property
without a struggle). Mr. Hawkins: is that a proper will? Re-
member, I have his rightful, legal will, drawn up by yourself,
leaving all to me.
HAWKINS
. This is a very wrongly and irregularly worded
will, Mrs. Dudgeon; though (turning politely to Richard) it
contains in my judgment an excellent disposal of his property.
ANDERSON 
(interposing before Mrs. Dudgeon can retort).
That is not what you are asked, Mr. Hawkins. Is it a legal
will?
HAWKINS
. The courts will sustain it against the other.
ANDERSON
. But why, if the other is more lawfully worded?
HAWKING
. Because, sir, the courts will sustain the claim
of a man—and that man the eldest son—against any woman,
if they can. I warned you, Mrs. Dudgeon, when you got me
to draw that other will, that it was not a wise will, and that
though you might make him sign it, he would never be easy
until he revoked it. But you wouldn’t take advice; and now
Mr. Richard is cock of the walk. (He takes his hat from the
floor; rises; and begins pocketing his papers and spectacles.)
This is the signal for the breaking-up of the party. Anderson
takes his hat from the rack and joins Uncle William at the fire.
Uncle Titus fetches Judith her things from the rack. The three on
the sofa rise and chat with Hawkins. Mrs. Dudgeon, now an
intruder in her own house, stands erect, crushed by the weight of
the law on women, accepting it, as she has been trained to ac-
cept all monstrous calamities, as proofs of the greatness of the
power that inflicts them, and of her own wormlike insignifi-
cance. For at this time, remember, Mary Wollstonecraft is as yet
only a girl of eighteen, and her Vindication of the Rights of
Women is still fourteen years off. Mrs. Dudgeon is rescued from
her apathy by Essie, who comes back with the jug full of water.
She is taking it to Richard when Mrs. Dudgeon stops her.
MRS. DUDGEON 
(threatening her). Where have you been?
(Essie, appalled, tries to answer, but cannot.) How dare you go
out by yourself after the orders I gave you?
ESSIE
. He asked for a drink—(she stops, her tongue cleaving

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