George Bernard Shaw a penn State Electronic Classics Series Publication

commonplace that it is impossible to describe them.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER 
[to Mrs Hushabye, introducing the

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59
GB Shaw
newcomer]. Says his name is Mangan. Not able-bodied.
MRS HUSHABYE 
[graciously]. How do you do, Mr
Mangan?
MANGAN 
[shaking hands]. Very pleased.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. Dunn’s lost his muscle, but re-
covered his nerve. Men seldom do after three attacks of de-
lirium tremens [he goes into the pantry].
MRS HUSHABYE
. I congratulate you, Mr Dunn.
MAZZINI 
[dazed]. I am a lifelong teetotaler.
MRS HUSHABYE
. You will find it far less trouble to let
papa have his own way than try to explain.
MAZZINI
. But three attacks of delirium tremens, really!
MRS HUSHABYE 
[to Mangan]. Do you know my husband,
Mr Mangan [she indicates Hector].
MANGAN 
[going to Hector, who meets him with outstretched
hand]. Very pleased. [Turning to Ellie]. I hope, Miss Ellie,
you have not found the journey down too fatiguing. [They
shake hands].
MRS HUSHABYE
. Hector, show Mr Dunn his room.
HECTOR
. Certainly. Come along, Mr Dunn. [He takes
Mazzini out].
ELLIE
. You haven’t shown me my room yet, Hesione.
MRS HUSHABYE
. How stupid of me! Come along. Make
yourself quite at home, Mr Mangan. Papa will entertain you.
[She calls to the captain in the pantry]. Papa, come and ex-
plain the house to Mr Mangan.
She goes out with Ellie. The captain comes from the pantry.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. You’re going to marry Dunn’s
daughter. Don’t. You’re too old.
MANGAN 
[staggered]. Well! That’s fairly blunt, Captain.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. It’s true.
MANGAN
. She doesn’t think so.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. She does.
MANGAN
. Older men than I have—

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60
Heartbreak House
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER 
[finishing the sentence for him].—
made fools of themselves. That, also, is true.
MANGAN 
[asserting himself]. I don’t see that this is any
business of yours.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. It is everybody’s business. The stars
in their courses are shaken when such things happen.
MANGAN
. I’m going to marry her all the same.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. How do you know?
MANGAN 
[playing the strong man]. I intend to. I mean to.
See? I never made up my mind to do a thing yet that I didn’t
bring it off. That’s the sort of man I am; and there will be a
better understanding between us when you make up your
mind to that, Captain.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. You frequent picture palaces.
MANGAN
. Perhaps I do. Who told you?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. Talk like a man, not like a movie.
You mean that you make a hundred thousand a year.
MANGAN
. I don’t boast. But when I meet a man that makes
a hundred thousand a year, I take off my hat to that man,
and stretch out my hand to him and call him brother.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. Then you also make a hundred
thousand a year, hey?
MANGAN
. No. I can’t say that. Fifty thousand, perhaps.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. His half brother only [he turns
away from Mangan with his usual abruptness, and collects the
empty tea-cups on the Chinese tray].
MANGAN 
[irritated]. See here, Captain Shotover. I don’t
quite understand my position here. I came here on your
daughter’s invitation. Am I in her house or in yours?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. You are beneath the dome of
heaven, in the house of God. What is true within these walls
is true outside them. Go out on the seas; climb the moun-
tains; wander through the valleys. She is still too young.
MANGAN 
[weakening]. But I’m very little over fifty.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. You are still less under sixty. Boss
Mangan, you will not marry the pirate’s child [he carries the