E-Book Version
101
REASONS TO HAVE
AN ABORTION
A Girl‘s Guide to Informed Choices
S
ERENA
G
AEFKE
CONTAINS
TRUE
STORIES
I wish someone had told me
the
TRUTH
about how much
this one decision would affect
so many other areas of my life
in the future … I think I would
have made a different choice.
—Sheila
E-Book Version
101 Reasons
Not
to Have
an Abortion
A Girl‘s Guide to Informed Choices
iii
in·formed choice (in-fawrmd chois) noun 1. Knowing what you are getting into before
you decide. 2. Having the power to make your own choice. 3. Knowing all the
arguments before you make a decision.
a·bor·tion (uh-bawr-shuh n) noun 1. A choice that cannot be reversed after it is taken. 2.
A life-altering decision. 3. Quite often the regret of a lifetime.
Unless otherwise noted, scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL
VERSION
®
. Copyright
©
1973, 1978, 1984 International Bible Society. Used by permission
of Zondervan. All rights reserved.
The "NIV" and "New International Version" trademarks are registered in the United States
Patent and Trademark Office by International Bible Society. Use of either trademark
requires the permission of International Bible Society.
Published by Serena Gaefke.
www.101girlsguide.com
Copyright © 2010 Serena Gaefke.
No part of this work may be reproduced without the permission of the author; however,
anyone may reproduce the
entire
work, without alteration, and distribute it as long as it is
distributed free of charge.
Front Cover Photo by Constantin Opris, available from
www.Dreamstime.com
March 2010 Edition
iv
Acknowledgments
With grateful acknowledgment of permission granted by:
All the woman who have so generously shared themselves for this book.
AbortionTV (www.abortiontv.com)
Anne Lastman (www.victimsofabortion.com.au)
Elliott Institute (www.afterabortion.org)
Fatherhood Forever Inc. (www.fatherhoodforever.org)
Life Issues Institute (www.lifeissues.org)
Love One Another magazine (www.loveoneanothermagazine.org)
Priests for Life (www.priestsforlife.org)
Sarah Hinze (www.sarahhinze.com)
Acknowledging: God‘s Grace, without which this book could never have been
conceived; the priceless moral support and computer assistance of my husband Charles; the
thorough manuscript proofreading by my wonderful mother-in-law Ellen; the professional
manuscript proofreading volunteered so generously by Virginia, Lynne and Sarah who
allowed themselfves to be God‘s instrument for me to move forward when my project
became stuck; the PA Public Libraries which allowed me to borrow countless books from
them; LifeSiteNews.com which gave me many ideas for leads, and anyone else who
provided feedback, encouragement or assisted me in some way. Finally, I want to
acknowledge the mothers of the world — without whom none of us would be here to
debate this topic today.
v
To each and every one of you.
May your choices be informed, your regrets be few and your life
be full.
vi
Contents
Acknowledgments .................................................................................................................. iv
Caution! This book contains TRUE stories .............................................................................xi
Why this book is needed ...................................................................................................... xiii
More reasons this book is needed… .....................................................................................xiv
An open letter to all women who have had abortions ......................................................... xv
Where do you stand? .............................................................................................................xvi
How to read this book — which one are you? .................................................................. xviii
Reason #1: The benefits of abortion are outnumbered ........................................................... 3
Reason #2: We know when life begins .................................................................................... 7
Reason #3: You have been lied to .......................................................................................... 13
Reason #4: Abortion clinics are allowed to lie to you .......................................................... 19
Reason #5: Most women want support — not abortion ....................................................... 21
Reason #6: Abortion is an unwanted choice ......................................................................... 26
Reason #7: No one likes abortion ........................................................................................... 32
Reason #8: If only you could see what she looks like ........................................................... 35
Reason #9: It‘s not just a bunch of cells! ................................................................................ 38
Reason #10: Your baby exists now, not in the future ........................................................... 44
Reason #11: A fetus is a human and humans are persons ..................................................... 48
Reason #12: Abortion in the physical sense is also abortion in the spiritual sense ............. 53
Reason #13: At what point is it too late to abort? ................................................................. 57
Reason #14: So what if the baby isn‘t viable yet? .................................................................. 61
vii
Reason #15: Abortion is not an act of love ............................................................................ 66
Reason #16: Do you kill a child for their own good? ............................................................ 70
Reason #17: Ignorance is bliss, until you discover the truth ................................................ 72
Reason #18: Is this what you really want? ............................................................................ 76
Reason #19: There are practical options to make things work for you ................................ 79
Reason #20: There is a plan .................................................................................................... 87
Reason #21: To fulfill her plan your child needs to be born ................................................ 91
Reason #22: Maybe you are pregnant for a reason ............................................................... 95
Reason #23: Being young and pregnant isn‘t the worst thing in the world ........................ 99
Reason #24: It‘s better to be alive with one parent than dead with two ........................... 103
Reason #25: Abortion is about a woman‘s body, but… ...................................................... 107
Reason #26: Pro-choicers admit abortion is killing ............................................................ 113
Reason #27: Women
know
that abortion kills a baby ........................................................ 115
Reason #28: God will forgive, but there are still consequences ......................................... 117
Reason #29: Abortion may affect your future fertility ....................................................... 122
Reason #30: Abortion carries risks ....................................................................................... 126
Reason #31: Abortion is not safer than childbirth .............................................................. 135
Reason #32: Abortion isn‘t a quick fix ................................................................................. 137
Reason #33: Abortion clinics target you when you are vulnerable and desperate............ 140
Reason #34: Abortion is an irreversible choice ................................................................... 146
Reason #35: Counseling at abortion clinics is a joke ........................................................... 149
Reason #36: ‗Freedom to choose‘ does not tell you
what
you have the freedom
to choose ........................................................................................................... 158
Reason #37: It‘s your choice! ................................................................................................ 161
viii
Reason #38: You are not alone ............................................................................................. 163
Reason #39: Some things in life are wrong.......................................................................... 167
Reason #40: Are you getting an abortion for someone else? .............................................. 170
Reason #41: You may regret your abortion for a very long time ....................................... 174
Reason #42: Your mom chose life ........................................................................................ 178
Reason #43: Do to others as you would have them do to you ............................................ 181
Reason #44: Going against your value system might not make you happy ....................... 183
Reason #45: Who cares what other people think! .............................................................. 186
Reason #46: Being responsible is more rewarding than copping out ................................. 191
Reason #47: Is abortion the responsible choice? ................................................................. 193
Reason #48: So you wouldn‘t be a good parent? ................................................................. 197
Reason #49: Abortion procedures are brutal ....................................................................... 203
Reason #50: Abortion may make you unhappy .................................................................. 212
Reason #51: Abortion creates secrets, suppression and denial ........................................... 219
Reason #52: Suppression leads to anger, depression and forbidden grief .......................... 224
Reason #53: The fetus can feel pain ..................................................................................... 227
Reason #54: You can begin bonding with your baby now! ................................................ 237
Reason #55: Your unborn child can feel, taste, smell, hear, and see .................................. 242
Reason #56: Abortion is playing God .................................................................................. 250
Reason #57: Why should God bless America when we kill His children? ........................ 255
Reason #58: Saving the planet starts with ending abortion ................................................ 258
Reason #59: You can‘t compare humans to animals ........................................................... 264
Reason #60: The abortion industry is a business ................................................................. 267
Reason #61: Abortionists don‘t enjoy their job ................................................................... 271
ix
Reason #62: Abortionists are known to have bad records .................................................. 275
Reason #63: Women have died from abortion .................................................................... 280
Reason #64: Abortion is not real medicine .......................................................................... 291
Reason #65: Right or wrong? It‘s all in the words .............................................................. 293
Reason #66: Every child deserves life .................................................................................. 298
Reason #67: You might be aborting a genius ...................................................................... 300
Reason #68: Planned Parenthood clinics are not neutral ................................................... 301
Reason #69: Planned Parenthood‘s beginnings were unsavory ......................................... 307
Reason #70: Hitler would have loved abortion ................................................................... 310
Reason #71: Hormonal changes cause moodiness around the time most
abortions occur! ................................................................................................ 313
Reason #72: Abortion isn‘t natural ...................................................................................... 317
Reason #73: Abortion is not a form of birth control ........................................................... 319
Reason #74: Abortion is selfish ............................................................................................ 321
Reason #75: Abortion may change your relationships ....................................................... 324
Reason #76: Slavery was legal too ........................................................................................ 326
Reason #77: Abortion is unconstitutional ........................................................................... 330
Reason #78: Have a child now while you can ..................................................................... 334
Reason #79: The population explosion is an urban myth ................................................... 336
Reason #80: Abortion is a betrayal of women ..................................................................... 341
Reason #81: Abortion after rape is a double tragedy .......................................................... 346
Reason #82: There are so many couples who would love to parent if you don‘t .............. 353
Reason #83: The father might regret it too ......................................................................... 357
Reason #84: Real feminists won‘t ask you to kill your own child ...................................... 364
Reason #85: There is still hope for your special needs child .............................................. 368
x
Reason #86: Abortion fetuses are often used in research ................................................... 373
Reason #87: Your unborn baby is intelligent ...................................................................... 377
Reason #88: We are self-aware before birth ....................................................................... 382
Reason #89: There could be a soul just waiting to come into your life.............................. 387
Reason #90: Abortion is not just a Catholic issue................................................................ 389
Reason #91: The Judeo-Christian heritage is pro-life ......................................................... 391
Reason #92: Move with the changing attitudes on abortion .............................................. 393
Reason #93: Abortion may not be medically necessary ...................................................... 397
Reason #94: Had one abortion? Don‘t make it two ............................................................. 404
Reason #95: What if the timing
is
right but you just don‘t know it? ................................. 408
Reason #96: Read the messages from women who have been there ................................. 410
Reason #97: Parenting is not something you can ever be fully prepared for .................... 412
Reason #98: Motherhood is an awesome experience .......................................................... 415
Reason #99: Save a life today ................................................................................................ 417
Reason #100: You can still live your dreams ....................................................................... 419
Reason #101: Be prepared — you might just enjoy being a mom! ..................................... 421
Final Words ........................................................................................................................... 425
Resources ............................................................................................................................... 427
About the Author ................................................................................................................. 437
Endnotes ................................................................................................................................ 438
xi
Caution! This book contains TRUE stories
As I was laying on the operating table and waited for the doctor, the nurse looked me in the
eyes and said, ―Are you sure that you want to do this?‖ Well, that moment hung for an
eternity...the question from the nurse haunted me years after the abortion.
—Cindy
I ran out of the clinic and just leaned up against the wall crying my eyes out. I couldn‘t
control it. Tears were streaming down my face as I thought, "Why the hell am I here? Why
do I want to kill my own child? My own flesh and blood!"
—Haley
As I sat down to put my shoes on, it began to hit me what I had done.
—Brittany
I left the building looking at each woman in the waiting room and tried to tell them to run
away and don‘t look back. But I couldn‘t speak.
—Donniel
I started drinking heavily, smoking pot, taking pills, snorting cocaine, and soon I was
sticking needles in my arms doing Demerol, cocaine, MDA, or whatever the crowd was
doing. Funny how none of those drugs erased the memory of me killing my child, or the
recurrent nightmares of the doctor‘s hands. No matter how numb I was, I still hurt very
deeply.
—Tena
I didn‘t fully feel the impact of my decision to abort until January 1980 when, after four
years of marriage, I had my son Justin. As I nuzzled him close to my chest and fed him, it
hit me. What had I done?
—Wendy
P.S. All stories in this book, identified by first name only, come from personal correspondence with the author. Some
first names have been changed at the woman‘s preference.
xii
It could never happen to me
As you NOW
know
…sometimes it does.
Shock. Horror.
So, it did. Now what?
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