Improve Your Communication Skills, 2nd Edition

Constructing a network map
You could go further. Constructing a map of your network (or 
networks!) might help you get more value from them. In 
particular, they can help you find cross-connections between 
people in different parts of your life.
You could create network maps on paper, or using software 
such as MindManager or The Brain. With yourself at the hub of 
the map, draw links to various categories: ‘Family’, ‘Community’, 
‘Education’, ‘Work’, ‘Music’, ‘Clubs’, ‘Friends’, and so on. Now add 
individuals to those categories that you know personally: people 
you would feel happy cold-calling on the phone. Add links to 
people that you know that 
they
know, or people that you are 
weakly tied to in some way. You could begin to add notes, colour 
coding and other visual effects to develop patterns or clusters of 
contacts (MindManager has plenty of functions to help you).
The trick in creating this network map is to concentrate on 
the 
weak
ties. People with strong ties to you will tend to share 
your interests, expertise and contacts. People with weak ties have 
access to new information, resources and people; they are the 
ones who will help you most to grow and enrich your network. 
(The sociologist Mark Granovetter coined the phrase ‘the strength 
of weak ties’ to capture this idea.)
Keeping the connections alive
Think of your network as an organism. It is alive, continually 
shape-shifting and adapting itself to your environment: your 
personal circumstances, your work patterns, your ambitions and 
desires. Like any organism, it needs to be healthy to survive and 
( c) 2011 Kogan Page L imited, All Rights Reserved.

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191 Networking: The New Conversation
grow: it needs feeding, nurturing, exercise – and occasional 
pruning.
Review your network regularly: perhaps once a year. Check 
contact details and clean out the system; move people around; 
make new connections. Ask how you can enliven contacts that 
have ‘gone to sleep’ for a while; think about how new 
relationships can help you in new ways.
In particular, look for the ‘connectors’. Connectors have what 
Prince Charles calls ‘convening power’. These are people who can 
act as mediators or ‘honest brokers’, putting people in contact 
with each other for mutual benefit. Ask how a connector could 
help you fulfil a need, and what would be in it for them.
The Netbank
We have a ‘net account’ with everyone in our network. Just 
like a real bank account, our net accounts with people can 
be in credit or overdrawn. (Whenever we say ‘I’m in your 
debt’, or ‘I’m obliged’, we are signalling the need to balance 
our net account with someone.)
Diane Darling suggests that the best way to check our 
net balance with someone is to try to make a withdrawal.
• When you need to call them, will you feel comfortable 
doing so?
• How long has it been since you put something into the 
account?
• The last time they asked you to help, did you do so?
If you think your net account with someone is dangerously 
low, make a deposit.
• Find something you can do for the person.
• Don’t ask them for anything.
( c) 2011 Kogan Page L imited, All Rights Reserved.

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