MSN GROUP: Mystery's Lounge
SUBJECT: Field Report—Life at Project Hollywood
AUTHOR:
Sickboy
For those who don't know, I've been sleeping in Papa's closet at Project Holly-
w o o d . Today was the best day I've ever had here, despite all the crazy drama
that has been going on.
I woke up earlier than usual and went surfing in Malibu with Style and his
girlfriend, who is really an amazing person. Seeing how cool they get along is
really inspiring. He's one of the few people I've met in the game who has
something great to show for all the effort he's put into it.
The surfing was amazing. I was so happy to go because I haven't gone
yet this summer. I recommend taking up the sport to anyone who's never tried it.
As soon as you hit the water, your mind clears and it's almost impossible to
think of anything else. It's truly a relaxing experience.
Afterward, we ate at a fish stand right at the edge of the Pacific Ocean
and had a great conversation about music, friends, traveling, life, and careers.
When I returned to the house, I did some work. Then I watched The Lost
Dragon with Playboy, whom I've become good friends with. During the movie,
Herbal and Mystery talked outside and settled their differences. Though Mys-
tery's still upset at Katya, he said he wouldn't hold it against Herbal for falling
in love with her. And Herbal said that if Mystery paid for the damages to his
room, he'd forgive Mystery for his behavior. Thank G o d . It's good to see this
thing ended in a sane way. Mystery will be moving out of the house tomorrow
anyway, which I think is a shame.
At about 2:00 A.M., Playboy, Mystery, and I sat in the main room smoking
a hookah, listening to music, and talking about our goals in life.
I didn't have a single conversation today about sarging, pickup, or the
community. My day was filled with real conversations with real friends. I didn't
need to fuck some L.A. bimbo from the Saddle Ranch for validation. In fact, I
didn't do a single set all day.
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These are the days that make life worth living. These are also the days that
will miss when I move out of Project Hollywood.
-Sickboy
I sat uselessly in the living room and watched Mystery pack the last of his
possessions: the platform boots, the ridiculous peacocking hats, the pin-
striped suits he no longer wore, the lunch box with his picture emblazoned
on the front, the hard drives filled with lesbian porn and episodes of That
70s Show.
I couldn't help feeling that maybe we'd made the wrong decision.
"So where are you going?" I asked.
'I'm moving to Las Vegas. I'm going to start Project Vegas. I've learned
from my mistakes here, and Project Vegas will be bigger and better. There
are hotter women in Vegas, and great opportunities for doing casino magic.
I'm going to fly my brother-in-law to Vegas to record his songs, with me
singing. Imagine"—he ran his hand along the air as if reading aline of type—
"the world's greatest pickup artist releases an album of love songs. Who
wouldn't buy that?" Mystery's manic sense of possibility was back. "Ania
will be living with me there. And, since you're my best friend, once I get it set
up, I'd like you to join me. We'll build it right this time. We will be in charge,
and we'll carefully screen everyone we move into the house."
'I'm sorry, man." I couldn't just follow him around every time he
fucked things up for himself.
"It'll be Mystery and Style, just like the old days," he persisted. He
opened the front door of the house and carried a suitcase onto the landing
as he delivered one of the many great aphorisms that he used to turn defeat
into triumph. "Where there's a problem, there's an opportunity."
"I can't go through this again." The words, apologetic, came out accu-
satory.
"I understand," he said. "Sometimes events turn sour, and we follow
bad threads in our lives. I want you to know that, even though we haven't
seen eye to eye lately, I will always be your friend, for life and a day. You
don't have to manage your relationship with me. Enjoy your girlfriend, and
we will always have time to hang out together. You are the most important
man in my life."
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My face swelled and my eyes tingled with the first flush of tears.
"Try not to queer that up, okay?" he smiled weakly, choking back emo-
tion himself.
A cab pulled into the driveway and honked, and Mystery slammed the
door shut on Project Hollywood. The blank whiteness of the door wavered
in the mist of my eyes. I felt like I was losing a piece of myself. For a mo-
ment, I couldn't figure out which of us was the bigger fool.
Within a week, Katya had moved into Herbal's room and Papa had
moved two PUAs into Mystery's old room. One of them was Dreamweaver,
a former student of mine; the other one I'd never met before. Papa planned
to move a third PUA into Mystery's closet. With the influx of new, younger
residents, Project Hollywood looked more like a frat house every day,
though most frat houses were cleaner.
Without Mystery sitting in the living room, ready and willing to share
the details of his latest drama with whoever passed by, the lack of commu-
nication in the house became even more uncomfortable. Whenever I
walked through the living room, I'd find new roommates lying on their bel-
lies on the carpet, playing video games. They never looked up or said a
word, even when I greeted them. They weren't PUAs; they were vegetables. If
someone had told me two years ago that this was the lifestyle I had to look
forward to, I would never have joined the community. I would have realized
that those who live by the joystick are doomed to die by the joystick.
At Papa's twenty-fourth birthday party, not a single woman showed
up—let alone Paris Hilton, who, needless to say, had never come to party at
Project Hollywood as Papa had hoped. His only friends were PUAs. And, for
some reason, they all ignored me. I couldn't understand it.
In the week that followed, Tyler Durden, who'd never been directly hos-
tile to me, started writing posts attacking me online. I decided it was time
to have a talk with him about everyone's strange behavior in the house. I
navigated through the overflowing trash bags in the kitchen; walked
through the backyard, where just a small puddle of sludge lay at the bottom
of the hot tub; and knocked on Papa's back door.
I found Tyler Durden sitting at a computer, posting on the seduction
boards.
"I want to talk to you about what's been going on lately," 1 said. "Every-
one in the house is acting weird—even weirder than usual. And you seem to
have a chip on your shoulder. Are people pissed because I've been hanging
out with Lisa too much and not going out sarging?"
425
"That's part of it," he said. "But a bigger part of it is that no one in this
house likes you. Everybody thinks that you're a snob and that you're re-
sponsible for a lot of trouble in this house, because you talk about people
behind their backs." Though these were strong words coming from Tyler
Durden, who had never said a cross word to my face before, his voice wasn't
venomous. He spoke almost obsequiously, as if he were trying to give me
constructive advice from one PUA to another. "I'm just saying this because
I'm your friend, and I don't want to see what happened to Mystery happen
to you."
I didn't know how to respond because I was so taken aback. I had no
idea the other guys in the house felt that way.
"Yeah," he went on. "Did you notice how Extramask used to be your
friend, but then he started avoiding you? Well, that's because he didn't trust
you. Dreamweaver told me he hates your guts. Maverick hates you too."
I thought about what he was saying. Maybe he was right. The enthusi-
asm I had brought to my first encounters with fellow sargers had dissipated
as I saw routines sold instead of shared and perfectly normal men turn into
creepy social parasites. So, though I was always friendly to everyone, maybe
they were picking up on the fact that I was growing disillusioned with the
community.
On the other hand, as Juggler had always pointed out, people tended to
feel comfortable around me. I'd always been friendly and easy to get along
with, even before I'd joined the community. I had no enemies, or so I
thought.
When I left the room after another hour of talk, my head was spinning.
I couldn't understand why these guys, who I'd spent the better part of two
years getting to know, hated my guts. What had I done?
The answer, I soon found out, was nothing.
When I saw Playboy in the living room packing his books into boxes, I
asked the usual: "What's going on?"
"I'm moving out."
First Extramask, then Mystery, then Sickboy, and now Playboy. I was
on a sinking ship.
"Do you have a few minutes?" he asked. "I want to get something off
my chest before I leave."
Playboy brought me into his room and shut the door.
"They're trying to freeze you out," he said.
"Who's trying to freeze me out?"
"Papa and Tyler Durden. They're using tactics on you."
"What are you talking about? What do you mean by tactics?"
"Wow, you really have no idea what's been going on up in Papa's room.
Tyler Durden is telling everyone to ignore you. He wants you to think that
everyone hates you. He's trying to make you uncomfortable in the house."
"Why would he want to do that?"
"He wants to take over. And he can't have you here because you
threaten him."
This explained the head games Tyler Durden was playing the other day,
the reason he was trying to make me think everyone was against me. He was
attempting to drive me out. He was running game on me.
"He sees you as a threat to his power because he can't suck you in.
You're not weak like Xaneus," Playboy continued. "He sees you as a threat
to his finances because you want him to pay rent. And he sees you as a
threat to his women because you made out with that girl he picked up in
Vegas. He thinks that if he lets his girls get near you, they're going to lose at-
traction for him."
"He's still upset about that?"
"Yeah. But I think the main problem is that Tyler and Papa associate
you with Mystery, and he's their competition. They have a gang mentality.
They think in terms of alliances. So they pushed Mystery out, and now
427
they're pushing you out. They want to make the whole house an office and
dormitory for Real Social Dynamics."
"I don't understand. How could they have pushed Mystery out? He dug
his own grave."
"But don't you see how they helped it along? How Papa invited Katya
to sleep at the house and then brought her back after Mystery kicked her
out? They were baiting him." Each sentence Playboy spoke was like a strip
of gauze being removed from my eyes. "Everything Papa said in his room
during the house meeting, he was instructed to say by Tyler Durden. He's a
follower. And I made a mistake by going along with it too. If I could do it all
over again, I'd vote for Mystery to stay. This house was his project. Even if
his behavior was out of line, he had a right not to want his ex-girlfriend
here."
I had played right into their hands. They were such masters of social
manipulation that they had set up the meeting so I thought I was in
charge. Papa even kept calling me the house leader. And thus, they'd man-
aged to make it my decision to kick Mystery out. So much for the whole
win-win idea.
"They played me like a puppet," I said, shaking my head in disbelief.
"They played me, too. That's a large part of the reason I'm leaving.
Tyler Durden can get those guys to do whatever he wants. He's not moti-
vated by girls. He's motivated by acquisition and power."
How could I have been so blind? In Las Vegas, I had even told Tyler
Durden point blank that he was the kind of person who liked to rise to the
top of a situation by eliminating his competitors. And he had agreed.
"All they do up in Papa's room is hang out in the bathroom and plot,"
Playboy elaborated. "Every word that comes out of Tyler Durden's mouth is
calculated. Every post he writes is to serve an agenda. That guy's mind is all
gears, turning and manipulating. He sees everything in life as a set. They
even talk about 'guy sets' up in Papa's room now. They have routines
worked out to make students give their workshops better reviews and rou-
tines to control guys in the house. Every time someone new comes up to
their room, they inoculate him against you."
We had created a dangerous precedent by studying how to control social
situations in clubs. It had led to a mindset that everything in life was a game
that could be manipulated to a player's advantage with the right routines.
But there was one thing I still didn't understand. "If what you're saying
428
is true," I asked Playboy, "why was Papa avoiding me and Mystery before
there was even a plan to freeze us out of the house?"
"That came from Tyler Durden too," Playboy said. "He didn't want
Papa representing Mystery's business as well as his, so he turned Papa
against Mystery as soon as you guys moved in. Then, once Mystery and
Papa started bickering, he told Papa to avoid you guys completely and use
the back door to enter the house."
So many connections were firing in my head as Playboy spoke. All the
weirdness that had been taking place in the house since day one had been
orchestrated by a little man in the closet, the wizard of Project Hollywood. I
felt like such a chump.
"The biggest mistake you and Mystery made," Playboy concluded, "was
having Papa move into this house."
There was a lesson here, perhaps the last one this community would
teach me. And that was always to follow my instincts and first impressions.
I hadn't trusted either Papa or Tyler Durden when I'd first met them. I
found Papa spoiled and robotic, and Tyler Durden soulless and manipula-
tive. And though they'd made great leaps forward when it came to fashion
and game, Mystery was right: The scorpion can't deny its nature.
Yet, at the same time, Mystery and I weren't entirely blameless. We had
used Papa as a patsy to sign the lease and pay for the most expensive room.
We had never attempted to befriend him or treat him as an equal.
When I was checking e-mail later on my computer in the office area of
the house, I noticed a program called Family Key Logger. I would have ig-
nored it if it weren't for the paranoia I'd developed as a result of my discus-
sion with Playboy. So I Googled the name of the program. When 1 saw the
results, anger swung through my body like a wrecking ball. Someone had
installed software that was capturing every word typed on the keyboard and
storing it in a text file. The computer was intended as a shared resource so
that residents and guests could check the Internet. This meant that who-
ever had installed the program now had everyone's passwords, credit card
numbers, and private e-mails.
Unbeknownst to me, there had been a war going on in the house from
the moment we'd moved in.
Afterward, I called Sickboy in New York. I wanted a second opinion.
"Does that match your experience?" I asked after telling him every-
thing Playboy had said.
429
"Totally. When Mystery was there, they did what they're doing to you
now. Tyler Durden and Papa would say, 'Don't talk to Mystery; freeze him
out.' Everything they do is a routine. The house meeting about Mystery was
thought out for days. They'd constantly talk about how to get Mystery to
move out so they could take control of Project Hollywood. The house is
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