Via's Secret
A couple of days after spring break ended, Mom found out that Via hadn't told her
about a school play that was happening at her high school the next week. And Mom
was mad. Mom doesn't really get mad that much (though Dad would disagree with
that), but she was really mad at Via for that. She and Via got into a huge fight. I could
hear them yelling at each other in Via's room. My bionic Lobot ears could hear Mom
saying: "But what is with you lately, Via? You're moody and taciturn and secretive. . . ."
"What is so wrong with my not telling you about a stupid play?" Via practically
screamed. "I don't even have a speaking part in it!"
"Your boyfriend does! Don't you want us to see him in it?"
"No! Actually, I don't!"
"Stop screaming!"
"You screamed first! Just leave me alone, okay? You've been really good about leaving
me alone my whole life, so why you choose high school to suddenly be interested I
have no idea. . . ."
Then I don't know what Mom answered because it all got very quiet, and even my
bionic Lobot ears couldn't pick up a signal.
My Cave
By dinner they seemed to have made up. Dad was working late. Daisy was sleeping.
She'd thrown up a lot earlier in the day, and Mom made an appointment to take her to
the vet the next morning.
The three of us were sitting down and no one was talking.
Finally, I said: "So, are we going to see Justin in a play?"
Via didn't answer but looked down at her plate.
"You know, Auggie," said Mom quietly. "I hadn't realized what play it was, and it really
isn't something that would be interesting to kids your age."
"So I'm not invited?" I said, looking at Via.
"I didn't say that," said Mom. "It's just I don't think it's something you'd enjoy."
"You'd get totally bored," said Via, like she was accusing me of something.
"Are you and Dad going?" I asked.
"Dad'll go," said Mom. "I'll stay home with you."
"What?" Via yelled at Mom. "Oh great, so you're going to punish me for being honest by
not going?"
"You didn't want us to go in the first place, remember?" answered Mom.
"But now that you know about it, of course I want you to go!" said Via.
"Well, I've got to weigh everyone's feelings here, Via," said Mom.
"What are you two talking about?" I shouted.
"Nothing!" they both snapped at the same time.
"Just something about Via's school that has nothing to do with you," said Mom.
"You're lying," I said.
"Excuse me?" said Mom, kind of shocked. Even Via looked surprised.
"I said you're lying!" I shouted. "You're lying!" I screamed at Via, getting up. "You're
both liars! You're both lying to my face like I'm an idiot!"
"Sit down, Auggie!" said Mom, grabbing my arm.
I pulled my arm away and pointed at Via.
"You think I don't know what's going on?" I yelled. "You just don't want your brand-new
fancy high school friends to know your brother's a freak!"
"Auggie!" Mom yelled. "That's not true!"
"Stop lying to me, Mom!" I shrieked. "Stop treating me like a baby! I'm not retarded! I
know what's going on!"
I ran down the hallway to my room and slammed the door behind me so hard that I
actually heard little pieces of the wall crumble inside the door frame. Then I plopped
onto my bed and pulled the covers up on top of me. I threw my pillows over my
disgusting face and then piled all my stuffed animals on top of the pillows, like I was
inside a little cave. If I could walk around with a pillow over my face all the time, I
would.
I don't even know how I got so mad. I wasn't really mad at the beginning of dinner. I
wasn't even sad. But then all of a sudden it all kind of just exploded out of me. I knew
Via didn't want me to go to her stupid play. And I knew why.
I figured Mom would follow me into my room right away, but she didn't. I wanted her to
find me inside my cave of stuffed animals, so I waited a little more, but even after ten
minutes she still didn't come in after me. I was pretty surprised. She always checks on
me when I'm in my room, upset about stuff.
I pictured Mom and Via talking about me in the kitchen. I figured Via was feeling really,
really, really bad. I pictured Mom totally laying on the guilt. And Dad would be mad at
her when he came home, too.
I made a little hole through the pile of pillows and stuffed animals and peeked at the
clock on my wall. Half an hour had passed and Mom still hadn't come into my room. I
tried to listen for the sounds in the other rooms. Were they still having dinner? What
was going on?
Finally, the door opened. It was Via. She didn't even bother coming over to my bed,
and she didn't come in softly like I thought she would. She came in quickly.
Goodbye
"Auggie," said Via. "Come quick. Mom needs to talk to you."
"I'm not apologizing!"
"This isn't about you!" she yelled. "Not everything in the world is about you, Auggie!
Now hurry up. Daisy's sick. Mom's taking her to the emergency vet. Come say
goodbye."
I pushed the pillows off my face and looked up at her. That's when I saw she was
crying. "What do you mean 'goodbye'?"
"Come on!" she said, holding out her hand.
I took her hand and followed her down the hall to the kitchen. Daisy was lying down
sideways on the floor with her legs straight out in front of her. She was panting a lot,
like she'd been running in the park. Mom was kneeling beside her, stroking the top of
her head.
"What happened?" I asked.
"She just started whimpering all of a sudden," said Via, kneeling down next to Mom.
I looked down at Mom, who was crying, too.
"I'm taking her to the animal hospital downtown," she said. "The taxi's coming to pick
me up."
"The vet'll make her better, right?" I said.
Mom looked at me. "I hope so, honey," she said quietly. "But I honestly don't know."
"Of course he will!" I said.
"Daisy's been sick a lot lately, Auggie. And she's old . . ."
"But they can fix her," I said, looking at Via to agree with me, but Via wouldn't look up at
me.
Mom's lips were trembling. "I think it might be time we say goodbye to Daisy, Auggie.
I'm sorry."
"No!" I said.
"We don't want her to suffer, Auggie," she said.
The phone rang. Via picked it up, said, "Okay, thanks," and then hung up.
"The taxi's outside," she said, wiping her tears with the backs of her hands.
"Okay, Auggie, open the door for me, sweetie?" said Mom, picking Daisy up very gently
like she was a huge droopy baby.
"Please, no, Mommy?" I cried, putting myself in front of the door.
"Honey, please," said Mom. "She's very heavy."
"What about Daddy?" I cried.
"He's meeting me at the hospital," Mom said. "He doesn't want Daisy to suffer, Auggie."
Via moved me away from the door and held it open it for Mom.
"My cell phone's on if you need anything," Mom said to Via. "Can you cover her with the
blanket?"
Via nodded, but she was crying hysterically now.
"Say goodbye to Daisy, kids," Mom said, tears streaming down her face.
"I love you, Daisy," Via said, kissing Daisy on the nose. "I love you so much."
"Bye, little girlie . . . ," I whispered into Daisy's ear. "I love you. . . ."
Mom carried Daisy down the stoop. The taxi driver had opened the back door and we
watched her get in. Just before she closed the door, Mom looked up at us standing by
the entrance to the building and she gave us a little wave. I don't think I've ever seen
her look sadder.
"I love you, Mommy!" said Via.
"I love you, Mommy!" I said. "I'm sorry, Mommy!"
Mom blew a kiss to us and closed the door. We watched the car leave and then Via
closed the door. She looked at me a second, and then she hugged me very, very tight
while we both cried a million tears.
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