A masterpiece of translations

Looking for happiness
It's been fifty years since my grandfather and grandmother's wedding. Less 
than a year later, when I decided to break up with Helen, I thought about this and 
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ran with my feet in my hands.
-
What is the joy of living together for fifty years? How did you do it?
Grandma
laughed before answering.
-
After asking this question, it means that you are having trouble getting along
with your wife. I'm glad you're trying to save the painful tooth instead of getting
rid 
of it like everyone else. I found your grandmother the day I stopped looking for the
perfect woman and wanted to be the perfect man.
Good advice
“That's it; I'm out of patience. He will never be a real man! I am divorcing
my 
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husband,” - said the girl with tears in her eyes.
"Perhaps you will try to find a compromise without saying that you will 
divorce," - said the mother sadly.
-
A compromise? Absolutely not!
When a mother looks at her daughter, she does not stop talking and does not
back 
down from what she said. Seeing her daughter's condition, she took a different 
approach.
-
Do you want a divorce? Well, I won't stop you. I don't want you to regret it 
one day and blame me for it. But do not rush to divorce! If you break up now, it 
won't affect him like a mosquito bite. He thanks God for saving him from the lost 
days of peace. Women who want their husbands to fall in love seduce him with
sweet 
words, speak respectfully to him, cook delicious food, and caress him with
affection. 
Then the wife suddenly files for divorce. Then you will see the show. May it be a 
blow and a lesson he will never forget! 
The girl looked at her mother and smiled softly. She imagined her husband
lying at her feet, begging. 
A week later, the girl called her mother and mother said: 
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