George Bernard Shaw a penn State Electronic Classics Series Publication



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Bernard Shaw - Pygmalion

They sit side by side on the sofa. She leans affectionately against
him with her head on his shoulder and her eyes half closed.
ELLIE 
[dreamily]. I should have thought nothing else mat-
tered to old men. They can’t be very interested in what is
going to happen to themselves.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. A man’s interest in the world is
only the overflow from his interest in himself. When you are
a child your vessel is not yet full; so you care for nothing but
your own affairs. When you grow up, your vessel overflows;
and you are a politician, a philosopher, or an explorer and
adventurer. In old age the vessel dries up: there is no over-
flow: you are a child again. I can give you the memories of
my ancient wisdom: mere scraps and leavings; but I no longer
really care for anything but my own little wants and hob-
bies. I sit here working out my old ideas as a means of de-
stroying my fellow-creatures. I see my daughters and their
men living foolish lives of romance and sentiment and snob-
bery. I see you, the younger generation, turning from their
romance and sentiment and snobbery to money and com-
fort and hard common sense. I was ten times happier on the
bridge in the typhoon, or frozen into Arctic ice for months
in darkness, than you or they have ever been. You are look-
ing for a rich husband. At your age I looked for hardship,
danger, horror, and death, that I might feel the life in me
more intensely. I did not let the fear of death govern my life;
and my reward was, I had my life. You are going to let the
fear of poverty govern your life; and your reward will be that
you will eat, but you will not live.
ELLIE 
[sitting up impatiently]. But what can I do? I am not
a sea captain: I can’t stand on bridges in typhoons, or go
slaughtering seals and whales in Greenland’s icy mountains.
They won’t let women be captains. Do you want me to be a
stewardess?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. There are worse lives. The stew-
ardesses could come ashore if they liked; but they sail and
sail and sail.
ELLIE
. What could they do ashore but marry for money? I
don’t want to be a stewardess: I am too bad a sailor. Think of
something else for me.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. I can’t think so long and continu-
ously. I am too old. I must go in and out. [He tries to rise].


107
GB Shaw
ELLIE 
[pulling him back]. You shall not. You are happy here,
aren’t you?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. I tell you it’s dangerous to keep
me. I can’t keep awake and alert.
ELLIE
. What do you run away for? To sleep?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. No. To get a glass of rum.
ELLIE 
[frightfully disillusioned]. Is that it? How disgusting!
Do you like being drunk?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. No: I dread being drunk more
than anything in the world. To be drunk means to have
dreams; to go soft; to be easily pleased and deceived; to fall
into the clutches of women. Drink does that for you when
you are young. But when you are old: very very old, like me,
the dreams come by themselves. You don’t know how ter-
rible that is: you are young: you sleep at night only, and sleep
soundly. But later on you will sleep in the afternoon. Later
still you will sleep even in the morning; and you will awake
tired, tired of life. You will never be free from dozing and
dreams; the dreams will steal upon your work every ten min-
utes unless you can awaken yourself with rum. I drink now
to keep sober; but the dreams are conquering: rum is not
what it was: I have had ten glasses since you came; and it
might be so much water. Go get me another: Guinness knows
where it is. You had better see for yourself the horror of an
old man drinking.
ELLIE
. You shall not drink. Dream. I like you to dream. You
must never be in the real world when we talk together.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. I am too weary to resist, or too
weak. I am in my second childhood. I do not see you as you
really are. I can’t remember what I really am. I feel nothing
but the accursed happiness I have dreaded all my life long:
the happiness that comes as life goes, the happiness of yield-
ing and dreaming instead of resisting and doing, the sweet-
ness of the fruit that is going rotten.
ELLIE
. You dread it almost as much as I used to dread los-
ing my dreams and having to fight and do things. But that is
all over for me: my dreams are dashed to pieces. I should like
to marry a very old, very rich man. I should like to marry
you. I had much rather marry you than marry Mangan. Are
you very rich?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. No. Living from hand to mouth.
And I have a wife somewhere in Jamaica: a black one. My
first wife. Unless she’s dead.
ELLIE
. What a pity! I feel so happy with you. [She takes his


108
Heartbreak House

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