Games People Play The Psychology of Human Relationships by Eric Berne (z-lib.org)
2 HOW DO YOU GET OUT OF HERE Thesis . The historical evidence is that those prisoners survive best who have their time structured
by an activity, a pastime or a game. This is apparently well known to political police, who are said
to break some prisoners down simply by keeping them inactive and in a state of social deprivation.
The favored activity of solitary prisoners is reading or writing books, and the favored pastime is
escape, some of whose practitioners, such as Casanova and Baron Trench, have become famous.
The favored game is "How Do You Get Out of Here1?" ("Want Out"), which may also be played in
state hospitals. It must be distinguished from the operation (see p. 48) of the same name, known as
"Good Behavior." An inmate who really wants to be free will find out how to comply with the
authorities so as to be released at the earliest possible moment. Nowadays this may often be
accomplished by playing a good game of "Psychiatry," Group Therapy Type. The game of "Want
Out," however, is played by inmates or by patients whose Child does not want to get out. They
simulate "Good Behavior," but at the critical point they sabotage themselves so as not to be
released. Thus in "Good Behavior" Parent, Adult and Child work together to be discharged; in
"Want Out" Parent and Adult go through the prescribed motions until the critical moment, when the
Child, who is actually frightened at the prospect of venturing into the uncertain world, takes over
and spoils the effect. "Want Out" was common in the late 1930's among recently arrived
immigrants from Germany who became psychotic. They would improve and beg for release from
the hospital; but as the day of liberation approached, their psychotic manifestations would recur.
Antithesis . Both "Good Behavior" and "Want Out" are recognized by alert administrators and can
be dealt with at die executive level. Beginners in group therapy, however, are often taken in. A
competent group therapist, knowing these are die most frequent manipulations in psychiatrically
oriented prisons, will be watching for them and will ferret them out at an early phase. Since "Good
Behavior" is an honest operation, it may be treated as such, and there is no harm in discussing it
openly. "Want Out," on the other hand, requires active therapy if the frightened inmate is to be
rehabilitated.
Relatives . A close relative of "Want Out" is an operation called "You've Got to Listen." Here the
inmate of an institution or the client of a social agency demands the right to make complaints. The
complaints are often irrelevant. His main purpose is to assure himself that he will be listened to by
the authorities. If they make the mistake of thinking that he expects the complaints to be acted on
and cut him off as too demanding, there may be trouble. If they accede to his demands, he will
increase them. If diey merely listen patiently and with signs of interest, the "Got to Listen" player
will be satisfied and cooperative, and will not ask for anything more. The administrator must learn
to distinguish "You've Got to Listen" from serious demands for remedial action.2
"Bum Rap" is another game that belongs in this family. A straight criminal may holler "Bum Rap"
in a real effort to get out, in which case it is part of the procedure. The inmate who plays "Bum
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Rap" as a game, however, does not use it effectively to try to get out, since if he gets out be will no
longer have much excuse to holler.