Games People Play

3 HAPPY TO HELP 
Thesis
. White is consistently helpful to other people, with some ulterior motive. He may be doing 
penance For past wickedness, covering up for present wickedness, making friends in order to 
exploit them later or seeking prestige. But whoever questions his motives must also give him credit 
for his actions. After all, people can cover up for past wickedness by becoming more wicked, 
exploit people by fear rather than generosity and seek prestige for evil ways instead of good ones. 
Some philanthropists are more interested in competition than in benevolence: "I gave more money 
(works of art, acres of land) than you did." Again, if their motives are questioned, they must 
nevertheless be given credit for competing in a constructive way, since there are so many people 
who compete destructively. Most people (or peoples) who play "Happy to Help" have both friends 
and enemies, both perhaps justified in their feelings. Their enemies attack their motives and 
minimize their actions, while their friends are grateful for their actions and minimize their motives. 
Therefore so-called "objective" discussions of this game are practically nonexistent. People who 
claim to be neutral soon show which side they are neutral on. 
This game, as an exploitative maneuver, is the basis for a large proportion of "public relations" in 
America. But the customers are glad to become involved, and it is perhaps the most pleasant and 
constructive of the commercial games. In another connection, one of its most reprehensible forms is 
a three-handed family game in which the mother and father compete for the affection of their 
offspring. But even here, it should be noted, the choice of "Happy to Help" removes some of the 
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discredit, since there are so many unpleasant ways of competing available—for example, "Mommy 
is sicker than daddy," or "Why do you love him more than you love me?" 
4 HOMELY SAGE 
Thesis. This is properly a script rather than a game, but it has gamelike aspects. A well-educated 
and sophisticated man learns as much as he can about all sorts of things besides his own business. 
When he reaches retirement age, he moves from the big city where he held a responsible position to 
a small town. There it soon becomes known that people can go to him with their problems of 
whatever kind, from a knock in the engine to a senile relative, and that he will help them himself if 
he is competent or else refer them to qualified experts. Thus he soon finds his place in his new 
environment as a "Homely Sage," making no pretenses, hut always willing to listen. In its best form 
it is played by people who have taken the trouble to go to a psychiatrist to examine their motives, 
and to learn what errors to avoid before setting themselves up in this role.