George Bernard Shaw a penn State Electronic Classics Series Publication



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Bernard Shaw - Pygmalion

throwing her arms round him]. Papa, don’t say you think I’ve
no heart.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER 
[raising her with grim tenderness].
If you had no heart how could you want to have it broken,
child?
HECTOR 
[rising with a bound]. Lady Utterword, you are
not to be trusted. You have made a scene [he runs out into the
garden through the starboard door].
LADY UTTERWORD
. Oh! Hector, Hector! [she runs out
after him].
RANDALL
. Only nerves, I assure you. [He rises and follows
her, waving the poker in his agitation]. Ariadne! Ariadne! For
God’s sake, be careful. You will—[he is gone].
MAZZINI 
[rising]. How distressing! Can I do anything, I
wonder?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER 
[promptly taking his chair and set-
ting to work at the drawing-board]. No. Go to bed. Good-
night.
MAZZINI 
[bewildered]. Oh! Perhaps you are right.
ELLIE
. Good-night, dearest. [She kisses him].
MAZZINI
. Good-night, love. [He makes for the door, but
turns aside to the bookshelves]. I’ll just take a book [he takes
one]. Good-night. [He goes out, leaving Ellie alone with the
captain].
The captain is intent on his drawing. Ellie, standing sentry over
his chair, contemplates him for a moment.
ELLIE
. Does nothing ever disturb you, Captain Shotover?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. I’ve stood on the bridge for eighteen
hours in a typhoon. Life here is stormier; but I can stand it.
ELLIE
. Do you think I ought to marry Mr Mangan?


103
GB Shaw
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER 
[never looking up]. One rock is as
good as another to be wrecked on.
ELLIE
. I am not in love with him.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. Who said you were?
ELLIE
. You are not surprised?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. Surprised! At my age!
ELLIE
. It seems to me quite fair. He wants me for one thing:
I want him for another.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. Money?
ELLIE
. Yes.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. Well, one turns the cheek: the
other kisses it. One provides the cash: the other spends it.
ELLIE
. Who will have the best of the bargain, I wonder?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. You. These fellows live in an of-
fice all day. You will have to put up with him from dinner to
breakfast; but you will both be asleep most of that time. All
day you will be quit of him; and you will be shopping with
his money. If that is too much for you, marry a seafaring
man: you will be bothered with him only three weeks in the
year, perhaps.
ELLIE
. That would be best of all, I suppose.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. It’s a dangerous thing to be mar-
ried right up to the hilt, like my daughter’s husband. The
man is at home all day, like a damned soul in hell.
ELLIE
. I never thought of that before.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. If you’re marrying for business,
you can’t be too businesslike.
ELLIE
. Why do women always want other women’s hus-
bands?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. Why do horse-thieves prefer a
horse that is broken-in to one that is wild?
ELLIE 
[with a short laugh]. I suppose so. What a vile world
it is!
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. It doesn’t concern me. I’m nearly
out of it.


104
Heartbreak House
ELLIE
. And I’m only just beginning.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. Yes; so look ahead.
ELLIE
. Well, I think I am being very prudent.
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. I didn’t say prudent. I said look
ahead.
ELLIE
. What’s the difference?
CAPTAIN SHOTOVER
. It’s prudent to gain the whole
world and lose your own soul. But don’t forget that your
soul sticks to you if you stick to it; but the world has a way of
slipping through your fingers.
ELLIE 
[wearily, leaving him and beginning to wander rest-

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