Ask More The Power of Questions to Open Doors, Uncover Solutions
CHAPTER 1 What Are You Thinking?
Executive presence begins in your head. It resides in how you think about
yourself, your abilities, your environment, and your potential.
Nearly everyone has an excellent presence; it may simply manifest itself in
another part of your life. Perhaps you are charismatic and confident as your
son’s baseball coach, or you are empathetic and inspiring to your best friend.
You give a bang-up speech at your college friend’s 40th birthday party, or have
just the right words to encourage your sister.
Most of what you need is right there in you, waiting to be tapped for your
professional life.
Intentionality is the driver of presence. All the communication tips in the world won’t make up for your thought patterns.
If you are concerned that having executive presence means faking it,
consider yourself reassured. The kind of presence that attracts other people to
you, makes your team want to move mountains for you, and propels you ahead is
the opposite of fake. It is pure authenticity—being more of the person you
already are, without the mental subterfuge that gets in the way.
I-Presence starts with “intentional” presence, because it is the driver. There
are no tips or tricks that will make up for a lack of intentionality. In fact,
sometimes tips can make things worse. Many executives, fresh from tip-laden
training in public speaking, find themselves even more nervous and less
authentic than before because it feels forced. They have all the same feelings and
anxieties about speech giving, but now they are also trying to remember to stand
this way or gesticulate that way. You can buy an expensive car with all the latest
features and a GPS, but if you don’t know the address of your destination, you
won’t get where you want to go.
You need to pick up the right intentions and let go of what’s in the way.
