351
something negative (lines 1,2), as if she has never seen the benefit of it before. Perhaps she is
listening to her counsellor for this seems important which is new (line 4), and so important to her
that she has to point it out with an arrow as if she wants this to be seen by the reader and maybe
herself. But it is hard to tell what seeing this from the other side (line 3) means. Perhaps it is
about voicing (line 5) what has been introjected so that what she has been unable to bring to the
sessions before (week 1) is spoken rather than only thought. She seems to exhort herself to speak
as if she is telling part of herself that she needs a voice that is heard. Also voicing these thoughts
may stop her feeling overwhelmed (line 6) by them. It seems possible that she decides to give
these thoughts back (line 7) to their original owner as if she realises that she does not have to
keep them as they are not hers. This appears to enable her to release feelings of anxiety (line 8)
as if what has been internalised previously has made her anxious. By the end of the entry she
wants to keep and use the gifts (line 9), perhaps of internalisation as if she has learnt that all that
she has internalised may be useful to her if she can use her thoughts in the session. Synchronicity
(line 10) stands on its own and suggests that this could be something she felt within herself and /
or with the counsellor as if there has been a meeting between them that enabled a new kind of
intimacy. It certainly appears to have felt good (line 11) for she uses as exclamation mark as if to
show her surprise and ends with „who me‟. Although there is no question mark she seems to be
asking a question as if she cannot believe that she felt good in a session. Perhaps the question
„who me‟ also demonstrates that she is wondering about what to do next as if she is asking
herself whether she can really have a voice that is heard, and feel good about it.
Dostları ilə paylaş: