George Bernard Shaw a penn State Electronic Classics Series Publication

Ellie comes in from the garden, looking anything but happy.
MRS HUSHABYE 
[rising]. Oh! here is Ellie at last. [She goes
behind the sofa].
ELLIE 
[on the threshold of the starboard door]. Guinness said
you wanted me: you and papa.

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86
Heartbreak House
MRS HUSHABYE
. You have kept us waiting so long that it
almost came to—well, never mind. Your father is a very
wonderful man [she ruffles his hair affectionately]: the only
one I ever met who could resist me when I made myself
really agreeable. [She comes to the big chair, on Mangan’s left].
Come here. I have something to show you. [Ellie strolls list-
lessly to the other side of the chair]. Look.
ELLIE 
[contemplating Mangan without interest]. I know. He
is only asleep. We had a talk after dinner; and he fell asleep
in the middle of it.
MRS HUSHABYE
. You did it, Ellie. You put him asleep.
MAZZINI 
[rising quickly and coming to the back of the chair].
Oh, I hope not. Did you, Ellie?
ELLIE 
[wearily]. He asked me to.
MAZZINI
. But it’s dangerous. You know what happened to me.
ELLIE 
[utterly indifferent]. Oh, I daresay I can wake him. If
not, somebody else can.
MRS HUSHABYE
. It doesn’t matter, anyhow, because I have
at last persuaded your father that you don’t want to marry
him.
ELLIE 
[suddenly coming out of her listlessness, much vexed].
But why did you do that, Hesione? I do want to marry him.
I fully intend to marry him.
MAZZINI
. Are you quite sure, Ellie? Mrs Hushabye has
made me feel that I may have been thoughtless and selfish
about it.
ELLIE 
[very clearly and steadily]. Papa. When Mrs. Hushabye
takes it on herself to explain to you what I think or don’t think,
shut your ears tight; and shut your eyes too. Hesione knows
nothing about me: she hasn’t the least notion of the sort of
person I am, and never will. I promise you I won’t do any-
thing I don’t want to do and mean to do for my own sake.
MAZZINI
. You are quite, quite sure?
ELLIE
. Quite, quite sure. Now you must go away and leave
me to talk to Mrs Hushabye.
MAZZINI
. But I should like to hear. Shall I be in the way?
ELLIE 
[inexorable]. I had rather talk to her alone.
MAZZINI 
[affectionately]. Oh, well, I know what a nuisance
parents are, dear. I will be good and go. [He goes to the garden
door]. By the way, do you remember the address of that pro-

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87
GB Shaw
fessional who woke me up? Don’t you think I had better
telegraph to him?
MRS HUSHABYE 
[moving towards the sofa]. It’s too late to
telegraph tonight.
MAZZINI
. I suppose so. I do hope he’ll wake up in the
course of the night. [He goes out into the garden].
ELLIE 
[turning vigorously on Hesione the moment her father is
out of the room]. Hesione, what the devil do you mean by
making mischief with my father about Mangan?
MRS HUSHABYE 
[promptly losing her temper]. Don’t you
dare speak to me like that, you little minx. Remember that
you are in my house.
ELLIE
. Stuff! Why don’t you mind your own business? What
is it to you whether I choose to marry Mangan or not?
MRS HUSHABYE
. Do you suppose you can bully me, you
miserable little matrimonial adventurer?
ELLIE
. Every woman who hasn’t any money is a matrimo-
nial adventurer. It’s easy for you to talk: you have never known
what it is to want money; and you can pick up men as if they
were daisies. I am poor and respectable—
MRS HUSHABYE 
[interrupting]. Ho! respectable! How did
you pick up Mangan? How did you pick up my husband?
You have the audacity to tell me that I am a—a—a—
ELLIE
. A siren. So you are. You were born to lead men by
the nose: if you weren’t, Marcus would have waited for me,
perhaps.
MRS HUSHABYE 
[suddenly melting and half laughing]. Oh,
my poor Ellie, my pettikins, my unhappy darling! I am so
sorry about Hector. But what can I do? It’s not my fault: I’d
give him to you if I could.
ELLIE
. I don’t blame you for that.
MRS HUSHABYE
. What a brute I was to quarrel with you
and call you names! Do kiss me and say you’re not angry
with me.
ELLIE 
[fiercely]. Oh, don’t slop and gush and be sentimen-
tal. Don’t you see that unless I can be hard—as hard as nails—
I shall go mad? I don’t care a damn about your calling me
names: do you think a woman in my situation can feel a few
hard words?
MRS HUSHABYE
. Poor little woman! Poor little situation!

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88
Heartbreak House
ELLIE
. I suppose you think you’re being sympathetic. You
are just foolish and stupid and selfish. You see me getting a
smasher right in the face that kills a whole part of my life:
the best part that can never come again; and you think you
can help me over it by a little coaxing and kissing. When I
want all the strength I can get to lean on: something iron,
something stony, I don’t care how cruel it is, you go all mushy
and want to slobber over me. I’m not angry; I’m not un-
friendly; but for God’s sake do pull yourself together; and
don’t think that because you’re on velvet and always have
been, women who are in hell can take it as easily as you.
MRS HUSHABYE 
[shrugging her shoulders]. Very well. [She