Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on It

QUESTIONS TO IDENTIFY AND DIFFUSE DEAL-
KILLING ISSUES
Internal negotiating influence often sits with the people who
are most comfortable with things as they are. Change may
make them look as if they haven’t been doing their job.
Your dilemma in such a negotiation is how to make them
look good in the face of that change.
You’ll be tempted to concentrate on money, but put that
aside for now. A surprisingly high percentage of
negotiations hinge on something outside dollars and cents.
Often they have more to do with self-esteem, status,
autonomy, and other nonfinancial needs.
Think about their perceived losses. Never forget that a
loss stings at least twice as much as an equivalent gain.
For example, the guy across the table may be hesitating
to install the new accounting system he needs (and you are
selling) because he doesn’t want to screw anything up
before his annual review in four months’ time. Instead of
lowering your price, you can offer to help impress his boss,
and do it safely, by promising to finish the installation in
ninety days, guaranteed.
QUESTIONS TO USE TO UNEARTH THE DEAL-
KILLING ISSUES

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What are we up against here?
What is the biggest challenge you face?
How does making a deal with us affect things?
What happens if you do nothing?
What does doing nothing cost you?
How does making this deal resonate with what your
company prides itself on?
It’s often very effective to ask these in groups of two or
three as they are similar enough that they help your
counterpart think about the same thing from different
angles.
Every situation is unique, of course, but choosing the
right mix of these questions will lead your counterpart to
reveal information about what they want and need—and
simultaneously push them to see things from your point of
view.
Be ready to execute follow-up labels to their answers to
your calibrated questions.
Having labels prepared will allow you to quickly turn
your counterpart’s responses back to them, which will keep
them feeding you new and expanding information. Again,
these are fill-in-the-blank labels that you can use quickly
without tons of thought:
It seems like __________ is important.
It seems you feel like my company is in a unique position
to __________.
It seems like you are worried that __________.

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