I don’t regret what transpired between me and Kaykhusraw at the end of the performance. But I am sorry
for putting Rumi in a difficult position. As a man who has always enjoyed privilege and protection, he has
never before felt estranged from a ruler. Now he has at least a smattering of insight into something that
average people experience all the time—the deep, vast rift between the ruling elite and the masses.
And with that, I suppose I am nearing the end of my time in Konya.
Every true love and friendship is a story of unexpected transformation.
If we are the same person
before and after we loved, that means we haven’t loved enough.
With the initiation of poetry, music, and dance, a huge part of Rumi’s transformation is complete. Once
a rigid scholar who disliked poetry and a preacher who enjoyed the sound of his own voice as he lectured
others, Rumi is now turning into a poet himself, becoming the voice of pure emptiness, though he might not
have realized this fully yet. As for me, I, too, have changed and am changing. I am moving from being into
nothingness. From one season to another, one stage to the next, from life to death.
Our
friendship was a blessing, a gift from God.
We thrived, rejoiced, bloomed, and basked in each
other’s company, savoring absolute fullness and felicity.
I remembered what Baba Zaman once told me. For the silk to prosper, the silkworm had to die. Sitting
there all alone in the whirling hall after everyone had left and the hubbub had died away, I knew that my
time with Rumi was coming to an end. Through our companionship Rumi
and I had experienced an
exceptional beauty and learned what it was like to encounter infinity through two mirrors reflecting each
other endlessly. But the old maxim still applies: Where there is love, there is bound to be heartache.