Games People Play

Antithesis
. The antithesis to First-Degree SWYMD is to leave the player alone, and to Second-
Degree SWYMD to throw the decision back on White. The First-Degree player may react by 
feeling forlorn, but seldom angry; the Second-Degree player may become sulky if he is forced to 
take the initiative, so that systematic anti-SWYMD leads to disagreeable consequences. The 
antithesis to Third-Degree SWYMD should be put into competent professional hands. 
PARTIAL ANALYSIS 
The aim of this game is vindication. Dynamically the mild form may be related to premature 
ejaculation, the hard form to rage based on "castration" anxiety. It is easily acquired by children. 
The external psychological gain - avoidance of responsibility) is prominent, and the game is often 
precipitated by the threat of impending intimacy, since the "justifiable" anger offers a good excuse 
for avoiding sexual relations. The existential position is, "I am blameless," 
NOTE 
Thanks are due to Dr. Rodney Nurse and Mrs. Frances Matson of the Center for Treatment and 
Education on Alcoholism in Oakland, California, and to Dr. Kenneth Everts, Dr. R. J. Starrels, Dr. 
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Robert Goulding and others with a special interest in this problem, for their continued efforts in the 
study of "Alcoholic" as a game, and for their contribution to and criticism of the present discussion. 
REFERENCES 
1. Berne, Eric. A Layman's Guide to Psychiatry & Psychoanalysis. Simon & Schuster, New York, 
1957, p. 191. 
2. Mead, Margaret. Growing Up in New Guinea. William Morrow & Company, New York, 1951. 
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CHAPTER SEVEN 
Marital Game 
ALMOST any game can form the scaffolding For married life and family living, but some, such as 
"IF It Weren't for You," flourish better or, like "Frigid Woman," are tolerated longer, under the 
legal force of contractual intimacy. Marital games, of course, can only be arbitrarily separated from 
sexual games, which are treated is a separate section. Those games which characteristically evolve 
into their most full-blown forms in the marital relationship include "Comer," "Courtroom," "Frigid 
Woman" and "Frigid Man," "Harried," "If It Weren't for You," "Look How Hard I've Tried" and 
"Sweetheart."