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CHAPTER SIX
ANALYSIS OF MAIN STUDY
6.1 Introduction
This chapter will tell the story of the main study analysis, including the difficult beginning, how
the journals were interpreted and how these interpretations influenced the choice of category
chosen for each journal entry. In the pilot study a process of categorising grew from the analysis,
from repetitive reading and organising the data as it was continually questioned and as I lived
(Denzin and Lincoln 1998) the fluidity of the process. Meaning, suggested by the participants‟
language influenced the choice of categories, as did the theoretical language already familiar to
me (Strauss and Corbin 1990). The analysis of the main study began in the same way. However
more attention was given to the analysis of the text and this eventually helped with finding the
category for each journal entry. Due to a personal bereavement, I seemed to be more aware of
loss and pain in the journals. Grieving brought opposition into focus in my life again, so this
must have influenced the analysis of the journals. But there were also times when I struggled to
work, to think at all and this also impacted on the analysis. As Etherington suggests qualitative
research may create the potential for the personal growth of the researcher “because we write of
ourselves in the process” (Etherington 2001; 119). It seems that as I grew through my grief, this
impacted on the analysis making me more aware of loss in the narratives.
6.2 A difficult beginning
The analysis of the main study journals felt different to the first study in that the length of time
the journals covered ranged from twenty five to fifty three weeks rather than the fifteen weeks of
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the pilot study. The participants were asked to keep a journal for up to forty weeks but were also
allowed to use their own discretion, or the ending of their counselling, to decide when to finish
the journal. This enabled the participant‟s own autonomy to remain part of the work. At the start
of the analysis I felt lost and rather overwhelmed by the quantity of the narrative to be worked
with. There was also a sense of being out of touch with the construct that emerged from the pilot
study as if I was unable to hold onto what had already emerged. My sense of conviction about
the categories seemed lost. It was as if the work was too enormous for me to contain or even
think about so there was an immense struggle to begin the main analysis. It was this inability to
think about the work that helped me to make the decision to interpret the texts without thinking
about categorizing. In this way it was possible to continue with the work rather than becoming
completely stuck. Each of the initial interpretations travelled through many drafts as I allowed
myself to become familiar with them. Naming the journals from their context happened as part of
this process as names that seemed to fit each participant arose from the narratives, these were:
Alice; Little Girl; Who Am I; Turned On; Wriggling Fish.
The names and story of each journal will be addressed in chapter 7. Only when each journal had
been analysed did the search for categories begin and I found that there was an interaction
between these two tasks as together they enabled a closer intimacy with the text. By interpreting
the narrative without thinking about categories there was a greater knowledge and understanding
of the texts before the categorizing took place.
6.3 Interpreting the journals
Firstly the journals were read and typed out, keeping as close to how they were presented as
possible. Both lower, and upper case lettering, speech marks and any other symbols were
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reproduced as accurately as possible. For example Wriggling fish in week thirty writes:
Extract 16 To illustrate markings copied from the original texts.
Line 1.
Sunshine, feel „lighter‟.
Line 2.
Thoughts of case study / client
Line 3.
My hooks, client hooks, 8 !! yrs.
Line 4.
Manipulation - weaving in & out.
Line 5.
A spider‟s web, the rings, sticky.
Line 6.
The web,
me the barrier
me
Line 7.
= NO WONDER STUCK !!!
Line 8.
Circle, hands held tight !!
Line 9.
White sculpture - female generations mine.
Line 10.
Stones - role reversal - chaos!
Line 11.Want to feel support of ancestors!
The amount of exclamation marks, the drawing of a spider‟s web, upper case lettering and other
symbols add to the impact of the entry. This is then taken account of in the relevant parts of the
analysis as seen below:
Extract 17. From the analysis, to illustrate the impact of symbols, punctuation and varied letting
on the interpretation of the text.
She provides the image of a spider‟s web (line 5) with sticky rings. She draws an arrow to the
centre of the spider‟s web and labels this as „me‟, as if she is caught in the centre of the web. She
then draws a barrier and labels this „me‟. The equal signs seem to emphasize that these are two
representations of her, as if she is both stuck in the web and trapped behind the barrier that she
erects. She starts line 7 with another equals sign as if she realizes that this combination of web
and barrier make her very stuck (line 7). She also writes this line in capitals again as if to draw
the enormity of the revelation for herself. It also feels important that this enormity is noticed by
me as the reader. Line 8 gives the image of hands, possibly hers, held in a tight circle, and it
seems possible that this may be the white sculpture of the female generations (line 9) of her
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family that she has inherited. The colour white hints at purity, and maybe she is concerned about
damaging that purity. Perhaps the stones (line 10) represent something that cannot be moved, yet
they seem to make her think of role reversal (line10) and the chaos that could be caused by this.
Exclamation marks at the end of some lines seem to emphasize the importance of all these
statements. She ends with wanting to feel the support of ancestors (line 11) as if there is some
fear that she may not feel their support if she is too different and reverses her roles. It seems
there could be a desire to escape manipulation, escape the sticky spider‟s web and the barriers
that hold her within the tight circle of purity.
All the elements in this entry add to the information about the participant‟s internal world as she
recognizes how stuck she has been. They image the way she sees herself and this demonstrates
the importance of copying the journals as accurately as possible.
In Little Girl the whole journal is written in upper case lettering. It gives a stark feel to the
writing. It also gives a sense of how thought out each entry was and seems to illustrate the
writer‟s pain at the same time. In week fifteen she writes:
Extract18. To illustrate the starkness of upper case lettering.
Line 1. SHE HAD GONE
Line 2. LONG BEFORE
Line 3. I LOST HER
Line 4. SHE HAD GONE
The impact of these few words seems enhanced by the upper case lettering. It is as if she is
learning to howl through her words as I did following trauma. The starkness of her loss seems to
be laid bare by the way she writes out the words. This is reflected in the analysis:
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Extract 19. To illustrate the interpretation of Little Girl‟s journal.
An image of unspeakable emptiness is created in these four lines. It seems that the client may be
realizing the loss of her mother in a new way, as if she is feeling, even seeing, the grief of all she
missed (week 14). Somehow her mother was lost to her even before she died. Perhaps there is
also some realization that the client had lost herself, long before she had felt that she had a self to
lose. There is a huge sadness wrapped up in these few words. This entry seems to hold a
monolith of feelings. There is so much loss that more words would cover it up, hide the reality of
how enormous this had been, and is for her. Perhaps this is why the client‟s style of writing is so
precise, for hidden in the order of so few words, is the chaos of loss and trauma.
Initially the journals were interpreted from a linguistic/poetic and counselling standpoint in order
to find the meanings and feelings both hidden and made clear in the words and symbols. During
the interpretation of the first journal five sets of expression emerged which formed a basis for
discovering meaning and understanding each journal. This kept a similarity of process within the
work and provided a starting point for each analysis. These sets and their functions were:
1. Images: imaging the client‟s present condition
2. Questions: the client wondering what to do next
3. Exhortations to self: the client telling herself what to do
4. Action + reflection: the client recounting an action and reflecting upon it
5. Adjectives: describing the client‟s present condition
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